“I would like it, too,” replied Mrs. Murray. “Perhaps he will come to me. At any rate, I must wait for that.”
At last, when the summer was over, and the harvest all gathered in, the days were once more shortening for the fall, Ranald drove Lisette one day to the manse, and went straight to the minister's wife and opened up his mind to her.
“I cannot keep my promise to my father, Mrs. Murray,” he said, going at once to the heart of his trouble. “I cannot keep the anger out of my heart. I cannot forgive the man that killed my father. I will be waking at night with the very joy of feeling my fingers on his throat, and I feel myself longing for the day when I will meet him face to face and nothing between us. But,” he added, “I promised my father, and I must keep my word, and that is what I cannot do, for the feeling of forgiveness is not here,” smiting his breast. “I can keep my hands off him, but the feeling I cannot help.”
For a long time Mrs. Murray let him go on without seeking to check the hot flow of his words and without a word of reproof. Then, when he had talked himself to silence, she took her Bible and read to him of the servant who, though forgiven, took his fellow-servant by the throat, refusing to forgive. And then she turned over the leaves and read once more: “'God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.'”
She closed the book and sat silent, waiting for Ranald to speak.
“I know,” he said, deliberately; “I have read that often through the winter, but it does not help the feeling I have. I think it only makes it worse. There is some one holding my arm, and I want to strike.”
“And do you forget,” said Mrs. Murray, and her voice was almost stern, “and do you forget how, for you, God gave His Son to die?”
Ranald shook his head. “I am far from forgetting that.”
“And are you forgetting the great mercy of God to your father?”
“No, no,” said Ranald; “I often think of that. But when I think of that man, something stirs within me and I cannot see, for the daze before my eyes, and I know that some day I will be at him. I cannot help my feeling.”