Sailor. "Well, in other words, I was blind, your Worship, I mean your Lordship." (Titters in Court.)
Counsel hastened to explain that Mr. Bowling wished to convey the unfortunate fact that he was intoxicated.
Sailor. "You've caught it, governor!"
Counsel was here heard to murmur words to the effect that he was thankful to say he had not caught it.
Witness (continuing unabashed). "Yer see, the reason as I was like I was, I 'ad snatched five dog's-noses right off."
Judge (plaintively to Counsel). "What does he mean by saying he snatched five dog's-noses? Why, was he possessed with a mania for mutilating animals?"
Counsel (explaining). "No, my Lord, the dog's-noses the witness refers to is a form of alcoholic stimulant—ahem!—gin, I believe, with some other ingredient, such as ale, mixed with it."
His Lordship. "Oh, very well."
Counsel. "Did the witness consider the Lord Mayor of London was sober?"
Sailor. "Do you mean that there old cove in the red gown?"