The fourth Chapter.360. 254.
A certeine king abused by an Alcumyst, and of the kings foole a pretie jest.
HE A king cousened by Alcumystrie. second example is of another Alcumyst that came to a certeine king, promising to worke by his art manie great things, as well in compounding and transubstantiating of mettals, as in executing of other exploites of no lesse admiration. But before he beganne, he found the meanes to receive by vertue of the kings warrant, a great summe of monie in prest, assuring the king and his councell, that he would shortlie returne, and accomplish his promise, &c. Soone after, the kings foole, among other jestes, fell into a discourse and discoverie of fooles, and handled that common place so pleasantlie, that the king began to take delight therein, & to like his merrie veine. Whereupon he would needes have the foole deliver unto him a schedull or scroll, conteining the names of all the most excellent fooles in the land.
So he caused the kings name to be first set downe, and next him all the names of the lords of his privie councell. The king seeing him so sawcie and malepert, ment to have had him punished: but some of his councell, knowing him to be a fellow pleasantlie conceipted, besought his majestie rather to demand of him a reason of his libell, &c: than to proceed in extremitie against him.A wise foole. Then the foole being asked why he so sawcilie accused the king and his councell of principall follie, answered; Bicause he sawe one foolish knave beguile them all, and to cousen them of so great a masse of monie, and finallie to be gone out of their reach. Why (said one of the councell) he maie returne and performe his promise, &c. Then (quoth the foole) I can helpe all the matter easilie. How (said the king) canst thou doo that? Marie sir (said he) then I will blotte out your name, and put in his, as the most foole in the world. Manie other practises of the like nature might be hereunto annexed, for the detection of their kna/verie361. and deceipts whereupon this art dependeth, whereby the readers maie be more delighted in reading, than the practisers benefited in simplie using the same. For it is an art consisting wholie of subtiltie and deceipt, whereby the ignorant and plaine minded man through his too much credulitie is circumvented, and the humor of the other slie cousener satisfied.
The fift Chapter.
A notable storie written by Erasmus of two Alcumysts, also of longation and curtation.
HE Eras. in colloq. de arte alcumystica. third example is reported by Erasmus, whose excellent learning and wit is had to this daie in admiration. He in a certeine dialog intituled Alcumystica doth finelie bewraie the knaverie of this craftie art;/255. wherein he proposeth one Balbine, a verie wise, learned, and devout preest, howbeit such a one as was bewitched, and mad upon the art of Alcumystrie. Which thing another cousening preest perceived, and dealt with him in maner and forme following.
M. Doctor BalbineA flattering & clawing preamble. (said he) I being a stranger unto you maie seeme verie saucie to trouble your worship with my bold sute, who alwaies are busied in great and divine studies. To whome Balbine, being a man of few words, gave a nodde: which was more than he used to everie man. But the preest knowing his humor, said; I am sure sir, if you knew my sute, you would pardon mine importunitie. I praie thee good sir John (said Balbine) shew me thy mind, and be breefe. That shall I doo sir (said he) with a good will. You know M. Doctor, through your skill in philosophie, that everie mans destinie is not alike; and I for my part am at this point, that I cannot tell whether I maie be counted happie or infortunate. For when I weigh mine owne case, or rather my state, in part I seeme fortunate, and in part miserable. But Balbine being a man of some surlinesse, alwaies willed him to draw his matter to a more compendious forme: which thing the preest/362. said he would doo, and could the better performe; bicause Balbine himselfe was so learned and expert in the verie matter he had to repeat, and thus he began.