When a man blind from his birth was asked what he thought the sun was like, he replied, “Like friendship.” He could not conceive of anything as more fitting as a similitude for what he had been taught to regard as the most glorious of material objects, and whose quickening and exhilarating influences he had rejoiced to feel.—Morris.
A brother for adversity is one who will act the brother in a season of adversity. Of such an one it is said, he must or shall be born, possibly, he is born. I do not understand this last clause unless the assertion is, that none but such as are born brethren, i.e., kindred by blood, will cleave to us in distress. Yet this is true only in a qualified sense. But another shade of meaning may be assigned to the passage, which is, that such a man as a friend in adversity is yet to be born, i.e., none such are now to be found; thus making it substantially equivalent in sense to the expression: “How few and rare are such faithful friends.”—Stuart.
As in the natural, so in the spiritual brotherhood, misery breeds unity. Ridley and Hooper, that when they were bishops, differed so much about ceremonies, could agree well enough, and be mutual comforts one to another when they were both prisoners. Esther concealed her kindred in hard times, but God’s people cannot; Moses must rescue his beaten brother out of the hand of the Egyptian, though he venture his life by it.—Trapp.
Man in his weakness needs a steady friend, and God in His wisdom has provided one in the constitution of nature. Not entrusting all to acquired friendship, He has given us some as a birthright inheritance. For the day of adversity a brother is born to many who would not have been able to win one. It is at once a glory to God in the highest, and a sweet solace to afflicted men, when a brother or a sister, under the secret and steady impulses of nature, bears and does for the distressed what no other friend, however loving, could be expected to bear or do. How foolish for themselves are those who lightly snap those bonds asunder, or touch them oft with the corrosive drops of contention! One who is born your brother is best fitted to be your friend in trouble, if unnatural strife has not rent asunder those whom their Maker intended to be one in spirit. . . . “There is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.” He must be a fast friend indeed, for a brother, if nature’s affections have been cherished, lies close in, and keeps a steady hold. . . . Oh, when hindering things are taken out of the way of God’s work, a brother lies very close to a brother. He who comes closer must be no common friend. . . . It is the idea of a friendship more perfect, fitting more kindly into our necessities, and bearing more patiently with our weaknesses, than the instinctive love of a brother by birth. From God’s hand-work in nature a very tender and a very strong friendship proceeds: from His covenant of mercy comes a friendship tenderer and stronger still. Now, although the conception is embodied in the communion of saints, its full realisation is only found in the love wherewith Christ loves His own. . . . The precious germ which Solomon’s words unfold, bore its ripened fruit only when He who is bone of our bone gave Himself the just for the unjust. Thus by a surer process than verbal criticism, we are conducted to the man Christ Jesus, as at once the Brother born for adversity, and the Friend that sticketh closer than a brother. . . . In the day of your deepest adversity even a born brother must let go his hold. That extremity is the opportunity of your best friend.—Arnot.
Verse 18. It is good to try him whom we intend for a bosom friend before we trust him; as men prove their vessels with water before they fill them with wine. Many complain of the treachery of their friends, and say, with Queen Elizabeth, that in trust they have found treason; but most of these have greatest cause, if all things be duly weighed, to complain of themselves for making no better choice.—Swinnock.
Seeing he hath not understanding to keep himself from hurt, it were good if he had not power in his hand to do himself hurt. . . . Surely such a fool may quickly wring his hands together in sorrow, who before did clap his hands in joy, and may strike himself in anger with the same hand, wherewith in the foolish kindness of surety he struck the hand of another. . . . For often this over-kind part of a friend is the breaking of friendship if it bring no further mischief.—Jermin.
The evil effects of strife and pride, which form the subject of verse 19, have been treated before. See on [verse 14], and on chaps. [xi. 2], and [xvi. 18]. Some expositors attach a slight difference to the meaning of the latter clause. See below.
outlines and suggestive comments.
“Sets high (exalteth) his gate;” a figure that is probably misunderstood. It probably means belligerence. A moat over which issued armed bands, with banners and mounted spearmen, required high space to let them go forth. “Lift up your heads, O ye gates,” etc. The soul that fixes itself that way against the Almighty, ready to march out upon Him on any occasion of quarrel, “seeks” ruin.—Miller.
The slothful man exposes himself to misery; but he waits for it till it comes upon him like a traveller. The aspiring man, that cannot be happy without a stately dwelling, and a splendid manner of living beyond what his estate will bear, seeks for destruction, and sends a coach and six to bring it to him.—Lawson.