“I don’t see what you can do. You’ll have to 339 take me. And I don’t see how you can take me any way but just as I am.”
Then she was suddenly conscious that the world was observing. She drew quickly away, and Jeffrey, still dazed and shaken, let her go.
Standing, looking at her with eyes that hungered and adored, he began to speak in wonder and self-abasement.
“After all I’ve made you suffer––!”
But Ruth would have none of this. It had been nothing, she declared. She had found work to do. She had been happy, in a way. God had been very kind.
At length Jeffrey said: “Well, I guess we’ll never have to misunderstand again, anyway, Ruth. I had to find God because I was––I needed Him. Now I want to find Him––your way.”
“You mean––you mean that you believe!”
“Yes,” said Jeffrey slowly. “I didn’t think I ever would. I certainly didn’t want to. But I do. And it isn’t just to win with you, Ruth, or to make you happier. I can’t help it. It’s the thing the Bishop once told me about––the thing that’s bigger than I am.”
Now Ruth, all zeal and thankfulness, was for leading him forthwith to Father Ponfret, that he might begin at once his course of instructions which she assured him was essential.
But Jeffrey demurred. He had been reading books all winter, he said. Though he admitted 340 that until last night he had not understood much of it. Now it was all clear and easy, thank God! Could she not come home, then, to his mother, who was pining for her––and––and they would have all their lives to finish the instructions.