"Where would our master be now without us?" cried the sailor, "where will he be if he allows these furrin chaps to put us down below hatches? Who then will he have to trim and shorten his sails when the stormy winds do blow? Will these fellows club-haul him off a lee-shore in the teeth of a gale of difficulties; or fight for him his battles? Not they, I'll swear."
The old sailor's yarn met with very great approval, and as is the custom with all sailors they freely damned their own eyes, and hitched up their trousers and swore that things were not as they ought to be; but the cheap-Jacks still went about amongst them and sold their goods, and people bought. Up too spoke many others, and there was scarcely a man to be found, or woman either, that was contented.
There was a movement amongst the crowd and the old cox'sn came forward, and getting up on the place vacated by the sailor, cried out: "Heave to, my hearties, whilst you hear to a brother sailor spin you a yarn." There was a feeling now pretty prevalent that they were in for a good thing. "No doubt," he said, "many of you here know me by name."
"Aye, aye, Jack, we know you," came from many; "you are as long-winded as a sky pilot, or as old Bill Dogvane, and any one knows he has wind enough to fill the sails of a line o' battleship."
The old cox'sn, nothing daunted, continued: "Belay talking, my lads. No doubt many of you know me by name, but many of you have no other acquaintance with me, more is the pity say I. Long-winded I may be; but I don't go about emptying myself like a wind-bag; but let that fly stick to the wall. Many a voyage I have taken with my old master, and when on the Spanish main together, looking out for the Don, we learnt a thing or two. The Spaniards say, my lads, that it is always a good, and safe thing, to search well yourself when anything goes wrong with you, and that is what old Jack Commonsense tells you now. You want our master to do this, and to do that, to protect this trade and that; but damme, shipmates, legislation never yet stopped a leak in a cask, nor made a stale egg into a fresh one. My mates! you are all of you heading in the wrong direction. There are breakers ahead, so put your helm down and go about as soon as you can. Don't you listen to those wiseacres who are going to put everybody and everything right. The cook, he is a clever lad, and can spin a cheerful yarn, but let him stick to his trade, and the same I say to the carpenter and the butcher. You can never put an injury right by committing a wrong, and if the carpenter or anyone else wants to put his hand into the squire's pocket, he is only inviting a thief into his own house. Let the cook then keep to his galley and cater for the general public. His dishes are spicy, and then when he treats us to a tune in his leisure hours upon his barrel organ, well, so much the better, for there is no harm done."
The crowd began to show signs of impatience, and old Jack was made painfully aware that he was not a popular orator, for the lovers of freedom hooted him; but he was not easily put down. "Here, lads!" he cried, "is where my Spanish proverb comes in. Search well yourselves, and see if any fault lies at home. It is no use anchoring yourselves by your starns, and crying out that trade is going, and that the cheap-Jacks are taking the wind out of your sails. You ain't obliged to buy from them, and who brought them over, pray? If trade is gone from amongst you; it is yourselves that you have to blame. In years gone by you combined against your employers; I don't say you were at all times wrong, but evil counsel sat at your boards, and with your bushel of good came a sackful of bad, you drove your trade out of doors and now you cry out: 'Help us or we starve!' If your platter and your pewter pot be empty, you have yourselves to thank. No song, no supper, is a good old saying. If you, my hearties, won't work your fair time for your fair wage, there are others who will. When you combined against capital, mess-mates, you frightened, if you did not kill, the goose that was laying your golden eggs. She is a timid bird and will only lay where she gets peace and quiet. Having done all this, you are now crying out to be protected, and think that all will be well again if this thing and that thing are only legislated for; but legislation, my lads, as I've said before, never yet bolstered up either a rotten state or a decaying trade. You may stop for a time the footstep of the one or the other, but the fall will surely come again unless you tap the part affected and stop the hole with good, sound, solid material. Look at you servants! Why, you are always on the move; some of you even are idle and insolent. Do you not see the gaunt form of Poverty in front of you? Away then will go your airs and graces, your flaunting ribbons and your finery Beware how you listen to the teaching of Demos. He is a dangerous companion and generally turns and rends those who have housed and fed him. A bridle for the mouth of an ass, and a rod for the back of a spoilt child."
There was here some good-natured bandying of words, and old Jack was recommended to try the bridle himself, just to see, as they said, how it felt and how it fitted. Jack being a good-tempered fellow, continued his harangue: "My advice, my hearties, to you is this. Turn to and live thrifty lives. Take your hands out of your pockets. Do away with the quart pot and you will increase the amount of stuff upon your platter. If you cannot do away with the pewter altogether—and I am no teetotaller myself—then reduce its size to at least a half. By a strict regard to economy, and by practising self-denial and by cultivating your understanding in a proper direction, try to turn out a better and a cheaper article than your neighbours and so beat them on their own ground. Do this, my hearties, and you will win back trade and regain your place in the markets of the world."
The old coxswain had been listened to for some time with a respectful attention; but the doctrine he preached was not at all in keeping with the general sentiments of the disaffected, who were stirred up and incited to violence by Demos and his disciples, and very shortly there was a disturbance of a serious nature. It was commenced by Demos, who having gathered a crowd of followers round him, began to speak to them in language peculiarly his own. The consequence of this was that some one from amongst the crowd, aimed a brickbat, with too true an aim, at the Buccaneer's old coxswain, who amidst the delighted yells of the mob was knocked over. The excitement now was intense, for though old Jack was not killed, he was severely bruised, and shaken, and taken very much by surprise. Those who have never heard the angry howl of an infuriated mob of Buccaneers can have no conception of the savageness of its sound. The war whoop of the wildest Indians is soft compared to it, and the roar of hungry wild beasts is less terrifying. Demos with what he called "the people" now rushed to an open space, beautifully situated, but called the Place of Discord, where four grim lions watch night and day, but they never interfere, and nobody minds them. Here Demos harangued the multitude; told them they were being starved and trodden under foot, by the drones of the island. His language was violent in the extreme. He called upon them to break their chain of slavery and to elect as their ruler King Mob. This was but natural, so up on their shoulders they hoisted the bloody tyrant and cried out: "Havoc and robbery; now shall the gilded thieves disgorge their ill-gotten wealth." Away they made for the rich quarters of the Buccaneer's fair city, intent upon plunder if not murder; but they were met by the guardians of the peace, behind whom came the old coxswain with a chosen band, cutlass in hand. He called upon his men to rally round him. Now commenced a battle between the two factions. The partisans of King Mob nerved on and excited by the hope of plunder fell upon the champions of law and order. Heads were broken and the combatants fell struggling to the ground, and the crowd swayed backwards and forwards in fierce strife. At first the old coxswain and his side seemed to be getting the worst of it, but he fought like a veritable demon, laying about him in a fashion well worthy of the Buccaneer's best fighting days.
What seemed most strange was, that the watchword was the same on both sides, namely Liberty. Step by step, the old Coxswain was beaten back through a narrow gorge which opened on to a small square in the centre of which was a statue representing Victory in her idle hours, playing at quoits. This open space was flanked on one side by a museum of Naval and Military antiquities, glorious relics of a glorious past. On the other side of the square and away from the narrow gorge was another museum, which was filled with a most valuable collection of ancient fossils, and other scientific remains. Back into this open space the old coxswain and his men were forced. Inch by inch they disputed the narrow way. Old Jack every now and again let fly a quaint oath or two; but as he afterwards said, the occasion justified the deed. In a voice of thunder he kept cheering his men on, crying out, "Rally, men! Rally!" Just as King Mob was pushing old Jack extremely hard, assistance came from an unexpected quarter.
The uncrowned queen had shut herself up indoors; but Madam Liberty upon whom both sides had called, came now to the front and allied herself with the coxswain. Knowing full well that if she allowed the ugly faced monarch to gain the day, she herself would, in all probability, be bound hand and foot, and cast into prison, with a gag in her mouth, she threw all her weight on the side of the coxswain, and brought up just in time her numerous followers to the rescue. Demos when he saw his mother against him, made use of most disrespectful language, calling her all kinds of bad names, which will not bear repeating. Just as Liberty reinforced the coxswain in front, the Beggar Woman who was now mounted on horseback, attacked King Mob with a strong force on his flank. Thus assailed, and without either drill or discipline the would-be monarch wavered, then turned and fled through the Place of Discord. The retreat was disastrous, and his followers were driven back well within their own quarters. As they went they did what damage they could; smashed windows and laid their hands upon everything of value that came in their way.