TO LOUISE FOX CONNELL
My Wife Who Helped Me With These Stories
CONTENTS
| PAGE | ||
| I | The Sin of Monsieur Pettipon | [11] |
| II | Mr. Pottle and the South-Sea Cannibals | [31] |
| III | Mr. Pottle and Culture | [51] |
| IV | Mr. Pottle and the One Man Dog | [69] |
| V | Mr. Pottle and Pageantry | [101] |
| VI | The Cage Man | [127] |
| VII | Where is the Tropic of Capricorn? | [145] |
| VIII | Mr. Braddy's Bottle | [165] |
| IX | Gretna Greenhorn | [187] |
| X | Terrible Epps | [207] |
| XI | Honor Among Sportsmen | [239] |
| XII | The $25,000 Jaw | [263] |
I: The Sin of Monsieur Pettipon
Moistening the tip of his immaculate handkerchief, M. Alphonse Marie Louis Camille Pettipon deftly and daintily rubbed an almost imperceptible speck of dust from the mirror in Stateroom C 341 of the liner Voltaire of the Paris-New York Steamship Company, and a little sigh of happiness fluttered his double chins.
He set about his task of making up the berths in the stateroom with the air of a high priest performing a sacerdotal ritual. His big pink hands gently smoothed the crinkles from the linen pillow cases; the woolen blankets he arranged in neat, folded triangles and stood off to survey the effect as an artist might. And, indeed, Monsieur Pettipon considered himself an artist.
To him the art of being a steward was just as estimable as the art of being a poet; he was a Shelley of the dustpan; a Keats of the sheets. To him the making up of a berth in one of the cabins he tended was a sonnet; an orange pip or burnt match on the floor was as intolerable as a false quantity. Few poets took as much pains with their pens as he did with his whisk. He loved his work with a zeal almost fanatical.