“They be a mighty dale more an middlin’, if you come to thic,” said the farmer.
“I’ve seen a good deal better,” remarked Snooks. This was always his line of bargaining.
“Well, I aint,” returned Bumpkin, emphatically. “Look at that un—why, he be fit for anything—a regler pictur.”
“What’s he worth?” said Snooks. “Three arf crowns?” That was Snooks’ way of dealing.
“Whisht!” exclaimed Bumpkin; “and four arf-crowns wouldn’t buy un.” That was Bumpkin’s way.
Snooks expectorated and gave a roar, which he intended for a laugh, but which made every pig jump off its feet and dive into the straw.
“I tell ’ee what, maister Bumpkin, I doant want un”—that was his way again; “but I doant mind giving o’ thee nine shillings for that un.”
“Thee wunt ’ave un—not a farden less nor ten if I knows it; ye doant ’ave we loike that, nuther—ye beant sellin’ coals, maister Snooks—no, nor buyin’ pigs if I knows un.”
How far this conversation would have proceeded, and whether any serious altercation would have arisen, I know not; but at this moment a combination of
circumstances occurred to interrupt the would-be contracting parties. First, Mrs. Bumpkin, who had been preparing the Sunday dinner, came across the yard with her apron full of cabbage-leaves and potato-peelings, followed by an immense number of chickens, while the ducks in the pond clapped their wings, and flew and ran with as much eagerness as though they were so many lawyers seeking some judicial appointment, and Mrs. Bumpkin were Lord High Chancellor of Great Britain; and they made as much row as a flock of Chancery Barristers arguing about costs. Then came along, with many a grunt and squeak, a pig or two, who seemed to be enjoying a Sunday holiday in their best clothes, for they had just come out of a puddle of mud; then came slouching along, a young man whose name was Joe (or, more correctly speaking, Joseph Wurzel), a young man of about seventeen, well built, tall and straight, with a pleasant country farm-house face, a roguish black eye, even teeth, and a head of brown straight hair, that looked as if the only attention it ever received was an occasional trimming with a reap-hook, and a brush with a bush-harrow.