“In the course of my reflections on tropes, I have frequently lamented the want of these embellishments in our modern log-books. Strabo says they were frequently employed by the ancient sailors; nor can we wonder at this difference, since our young seamen are such bad scholars: not so in other countries; for I have seen children at the island of Zanti, who knew more of Greek than any First Lieutenant. Now to return to Tropes, and of their use in Parliament. I will give you some examples of the most perfect kind in each species, and then quit the subject; only observing, that the worst kind of tropes are puns; and that tropes, when used in controversy, ought to be very obscure; for many people do not know how to answer what they do not understand.
“Suppose I was desirous of pressing forward any measure, and that I apprehended that the opposite party wished to delay it, I should personify procrastination by one of the following manners:
1. “This measure appears to be filtered through the drip-stone of procrastination.” This beautiful phrase was invented by a near relation of mine, whose talents bid fair to make a most distinguished figure in the senate.
2. “This is another dish cooked up by the procrastinating spirit.” The boldness of this figure, which was invented by Mr. Drake, cannot be too much admired.
3. “This appears to be the last hair in the tail of procrastination.”
“The Master of the Rolls, who first used this phrase, is a most eloquent speaker; but I think the two former instances much more beautiful, inasmuch as the latter personification is drawn from a dumb creature, which is not so fine a source of metaphor as a Christian.
“Having thus exhausted the subject of metaphors, I shall say a few words concerning similes, the second of tropical figures, in point of importance.”
ANECDOTES OF MR. PITT.
As nothing which relates to this great man can be indifferent to the public, we are happy in laying before our readers the following particulars, the truth of which may be depended on:—
MR. PITT rises about Nine, when the weather is clear; but if it should rain, Dr. PRETTYMAN advises him to lay about an hour longer. The first thing he does is to eat no breakfast, that he may have a better appetite for his dinner. About ten he generally blows his nose and cuts his toe-nails; and while he takes the exercise of his bidet, Dr. PRETTYMAN reads to him the different petitions and memorials that have been presented to him. About eleven his valet brings in Mr. ATKINSON and a WARM SHIRT, and they talk over the New Scrip, and other matters of finance. Mr. ATKINSON has said to his confidential friends round ’Change, that Mr. PITT always speaks to him with great affability. At twelve Mr. PITT retires to a water-closet, adjoining to which is a small cabinet, from whence Mr. JENKINSON confers with him on the secret instructions from BUCKINGHAM-HOUSE. After this, Mr. PITT takes a long lesson of dancing; and Mr. GALLINI says, that if he did not turn in his toes, and hold down his head, he would be a very good dancer. At two Mr. WILBERFORCE comes in, and they both play with Mr. PITT’s black dog, whom they are very fond of, because he is like Lord MULGRAVE in the face, and barks out of time to the organs that pass in the street. After this Mr. PITT rides. We are credibly informed, that he often pats his horse; and, indeed, he is remarkably fond of all dumb creatures both in and out of Parliament. At four he sleeps.—Mr. PITT eats very heartily, drinks one bottle of port, and two when he speaks; so that we may hope that Great Britain will long be blessed with the superintendance of this virtuous and able young Minister!!!