The Secretary of State in the discussion of the abovementioned tax, very ably calculated the great quantity of tea consumed under hedges by vagrants, who have no houses; from which he most ingeniously argued to the justice and equity of laying the impost on persons who have houses, whether they consume it or not.
We shall conclude this number, as the Poet concludes the subject, with some animated verses on Mr. FOX and Mr. PITT.
Crown the froth’d Porter, slay the fatted Ox,
And give the British meal to British Fox.
But for an Indian minister more fit,
Ten cups of purest Padrae pour for PITT,
Pure as himself; add sugar too and cream,
Sweet as his temper, bland as flows the stream
Of his smooth eloquence; then crisply nice
The muffin toast, or bread and butter slice,
Thin as his arguments, that mock the mind,
Gone, ere you taste,—no relish left behind.
Where beauteous Brighton overlooks the sea,
These be his joys: and STEELE shall make the Tea.
How neat! how delicate! and how unexpected is the allusion in the last couplet! These two lines alone include the substance of whole columns, in the ministerial papers of last summer, on the sober, the chaste, the virtuous, the edifying manner in which the Immaculate Young Man passed the recess from public business; not in riot and debauchery, not in gaming, not in attendance on ladies, either modest or immodest, but in drinking Tea with Mr. Steele, at the Castle in Brighthelmstone. Let future ages read and admire!
[1] We have the highest law authority for this title; as well as for calling Mr. Hastings Alexander the Great.
[2] The Tea-dealers assure us, that Mr. PRESTON’s sweet and fresh Teas contain a great part of the musty and mouldy chests, which the Trade rejected.
* * * * *
NUMBER IX.
In every new edition of this incomparable poem, it has been the invariable practice of the author, to take an opportunity of adverting to such recent circumstances, as have occurred since the original publication of it relative to any of the illustrious characters he has celebrated. The public has lately been assured that, the Marquis of Graham is elected Chancellor of the University of Glasgow, and has presented that learned body with a complete set of the engravings of Piranesi, an eminent Italian artist; of which we are happy to acquaint the Dilettanti, a few remaining sets are to be purchased at Mr. Alderman Boydell’s printshop, in Cheapside, price twelve pounds twelve shillings each. An anecdote reflecting so much honour upon one of the favourite characters of our author, could not pass unnoticed in the ROLLIAD; and accordingly, in his last edition, we find the following complimentary lines upon the subject:
If right the Bard, whose numbers sweetly flow,
That all our knowledge is ourselves to know;
A sage like GRAHAM, can the world produce,
Who in full senate call’d himself a goose?
The admiring Commons, from the high-born youth,
With wonder heard this undisputed truth;
Exulting Glasgow claim’d him for her own,
And plac’d the prodigy on Learning’s throne.