Here lies Johnie Pigeon; What was his religion? Whae’er desires to ken, To some other warl’ Maun follow the carl, For here Johnie Pigeon had nane! Strong ale was ablution, Small beer persecution, A dram was memento mori; But a full-flowing bowl Was the saving his soul, And port was celestial glory.
Epitaph For James Smith
Lament him, Mauchline husbands a’, He aften did assist ye; For had ye staid hale weeks awa, Your wives they ne’er had miss’d ye. Ye Mauchline bairns, as on ye press To school in bands thegither, O tread ye lightly on his grass,— Perhaps he was your father!
Adam Armour’s Prayer
Gude pity me, because I’m little! For though I am an elf o’ mettle, An’ can, like ony wabster’s shuttle, Jink there or here, Yet, scarce as lang’s a gude kail-whittle, I’m unco queer. An’ now Thou kens our waefu’ case; For Geordie’s jurr we’re in disgrace, Because we stang’d her through the place, An’ hurt her spleuchan; For whilk we daurna show our face Within the clachan. An’ now we’re dern’d in dens and hollows, And hunted, as was William Wallace, Wi’ constables-thae blackguard fallows, An’ sodgers baith; But Gude preserve us frae the gallows, That shamefu’ death! Auld grim black-bearded Geordie’s sel’— O shake him owre the mouth o’ hell! There let him hing, an’ roar, an’ yell Wi’ hideous din, And if he offers to rebel, Then heave him in. When Death comes in wi’ glimmerin blink, An’ tips auld drucken Nanse the wink, May Sautan gie her doup a clink Within his yett, An’ fill her up wi’ brimstone drink, Red-reekin het. Though Jock an’ hav’rel Jean are merry— Some devil seize them in a hurry, An’ waft them in th’ infernal wherry Straught through the lake, An’ gie their hides a noble curry Wi’ oil of aik! As for the jurr-puir worthless body! She’s got mischief enough already; Wi’ stanged hips, and buttocks bluidy She’s suffer’d sair; But, may she wintle in a woody, If she wh-e mair!
The Jolly Beggars: A Cantata1
[Footnote 1: Not published by Burns.] Recitativo When lyart leaves bestrow the yird, Or wavering like the bauckie-bird, Bedim cauld Boreas’ blast; When hailstanes drive wi’ bitter skyte, And infant frosts begin to bite, In hoary cranreuch drest; Ae night at e’en a merry core O’ randie, gangrel bodies, In Poosie-Nansie’s held the splore, To drink their orra duddies; Wi’ quaffing an’ laughing, They ranted an’ they sang, Wi’ jumping an’ thumping, The vera girdle rang, First, neist the fire, in auld red rags, Ane sat, weel brac’d wi’ mealy bags, And knapsack a’ in order; His doxy lay within his arm; Wi’ usquebae an’ blankets warm She blinkit on her sodger; An’ aye he gies the tozie drab The tither skelpin’ kiss, While she held up her greedy gab, Just like an aumous dish; Ilk smack still, did crack still, Just like a cadger’s whip; Then staggering an’ swaggering He roar’d this ditty up—