In this way many of those who might be called the sober and decent part of the regiment, gradually fell from their steadfastness, and became as dissipated as those whom they had condemned. From the miserable languor produced by idleness and the climate, they now did not bethink themselves of any other refuge than liquor; mustering a fuddle as often as possible; which is by two or three of them clubbing together for a rupee's worth of arrack[10]; and it was no uncommon thing to hear it said, on these occasions, that it was of no use for them to lay up money for others to spend; and as their comrades were dying so fast, and they did not know how soon it would be their turn, it was the best way to be merry when they had it in their power; saying in effect, "Let us eat and drink, for to-morrow we die." In their drunken rambles they would often have altercations amongst themselves, or with the noncommissioned officers, when trying to keep good order amongst them, which brought them under one or more breaches of the articles of war; and this not unfrequently terminated in their pain and dishonour, by their being exposed to corporal punishment in the front of the regiment. To those who had any regard to their good name, this was a severe trial, and the effect generally was, that it either cast them into a despondency of mind, or more commonly rendered them utterly regardless of their character ever afterwards.
I may also notice a circumstance which had not a little influence in spreading this evil contagion amongst us.
After we crossed the equinoctial line, going to India, it was the notion of a number, even of the men who seemed to have had something like religious instruction, that they were then under no obligations to keep the sabbath, saying, that there was no sabbath beyond the line. This sentiment became a matter of frequent discussion amongst many of them, and seemed to receive a very welcome reception. I could not suppose that they were in earnest in this opinion, until they manifested by their conduct either that they really believed it, or that they had succeeded in silencing their conscience on the subject; for, after passing the line, they made no scruple whatever of whistling and singing, and passing the sabbath day in vain and unprofitable discourse, if not in profane talking and jesting. On their arrival in India, their notions were still farther confirmed by the irreligious and profane example set before them by our countrymen of all ranks. As they were in a land of heathens they thought they had liberty to live as heathens. The contagion spread rapidly in the regiment, and cast down many wounded; and not a few of those whom I thought to be strong men were slain by it.
The Apostolic injunction against the dangerous consequences of evil principle and evil example is, "Be not deceived, evil communications corrupt good manners." I will now, as I promised, illustrate these remarks by one or two examples, and Oh! how it pains me to think that ever I should have it in my power to draw these illustrations from the conduct of those whom I once loved; but I hope my reader will not blame me, as what I shall mention now cannot disturb the mouldering ashes of my once dear companions, and as their names shall be concealed, lest it might give a wound to the hearts of their relatives, if this little work should come in their way, which nothing could heal.
The reasons I select the following persons in preference to many others are, first, that I was intimately acquainted with them, and am, therefore, under no hazard of being led into any mistake about what I am going to write; and the other is, that when I see this, I may remember my former dangerous situation, and have something before me well calculated to excite my thankfulness to that Power, who has preserved me from being wrecked upon those rocks, which dashed them to pieces.
The reader may recollect that I was formerly a fifer in the grenadier company of the 26th Regiment, and also that there were a great number of the men took the bounty from that corps and went to the Royals. While I was in that company and regiment I had a young man for my comrade, whom I shall call J. F. who was a man of very sober habits, being given to none of those vices for which soldiers are remarkable; nay, he was even so much averse to swearing, that he used to reprove me frequently for making use of what are generally termed minced oaths, to which I was then much addicted, but by means of his repeated friendly and seasonable admonitions, I was at last enabled to leave them off. After we came to India, however, he attached himself to some of those men who had imbibed the libertine principles mentioned above, and with these "evil men and seducers, he waxed worse and worse, deceiving and being deceived." Solomon's question is a pertinent one: "Can a man carry fire in his bosom and his clothes not be burnt? Can a man walk upon hot coals and his feet not be burnt?" Alas, my poor friend soon forgot his own admonitions to me, about my swearing when in Dublin; and when I reminded him of them, he only laughed me to scorn; for the oaths I made use of at that time, when he acted so friendly a part in pointing out to me the evil of the practice, were to him now quite insignificant. Nothing, in regard to swearing, appeared to satisfy him now but the great and dreadful names of Jehovah, and those glorious attributes by which he makes himself known; nor was this all, for he became a mocker at every thing sacred, making himself acquainted with the word of God, for no other reason than as a store-house whence he might amply supply himself with expressions which he could pervert to the purposes of buffoonery, and that he might be able to pour down vollies of raillery upon all those who had even but a small form of godliness[11]. To show you how far his wickedness carried him, I may mention, that at one time he and another of his lewd companions went at night to the hospital where a woman's husband was lying a corpse, and she sitting up with the remains of him who was once loved but now departed, each having a white sheet about him, to make the poor affrighted and rather superstitious female believe, that it was the husband returned from the other world, attended by some of his kindred spirits to pay her a visit, which almost put the poor woman out of her mind. This piece of barbarous conduct was made up, else it would have probably cost them both their serjeants' coats.
The reader may easily suppose that I had, long ere now, ceased to keep company with him; for all my attempts to show him the inconsistency and criminality of his conduct had long before this time proved useless. I therefore saw it to be my duty to keep at a distance from him, for the admonition is, "from such withdraw thyself."
To be short, he was seized by the flux in Trichinopoly, of which disorder he died. I have said that he had been long to me "as a heathen man and a publican;" but when I heard that he was dangerously ill, I was certainly very sorry for the poor lad, and went up as soon as I could find it convenient to see him, which was the night before we marched for Bangalore. I asked about his complaint, and if he thought he was getting any better. He said he was very ill, and not likely to get better.
Fain would I have spoken to him about his spiritual malady, which was my greatest concern, but I was afraid to be rash, lest he should take it rather as a reproach than as a friendly inquiry or salutary admonition, and therefore waited a little to see if he would break in upon the subject first. He was not long in partly relieving my anxiety, by saying, he had been a very wicked man. This he acknowledged in the general, and did not condescend to particulars; but in a very few words said he was afraid he would soon die; and, like most men who have led a wicked life, he added, that if he got better he would never be what he had been, and that he had been long J. F. but he would be so no longer. To which I answered, I hope you may not; but without strength to aid your resolutions, I am afraid there will be little change for the better; and having pointed him to the only refuge for sinners, even to him "who is able to save to the very uttermost," I left him: but how did it strike like a dart through my liver, when we arrived at the first camp ground from Trichinopoly, to hear that poor J. F. was no longer in the land of the living, and in the place of hope. This was truly a melancholy case, but I will not say that it was without hope, for he who saved one at the last hour, was able also to save him. But this is no encouragement for us "to continue in sin, that grace may abound." There is indeed one case mentioned in Scripture of a person being saved at the last hour, that none may despair, and but one, that none may presume. Ah! my dear reader, let not you and I hazard our eternal all on such an uncertainty, for these are dreadful words: "Because I have called, and ye refused; I have stretched out my Hand, and no man regarded; but ye have set at nought all my counsel, and would none of my reproof; I also will laugh at your calamity; I will mock when your fear cometh: when your fear cometh as desolation, and your destruction cometh as a whirlwind; when distress and anguish cometh upon you. Then shall they call upon me, but I will not answer; they shall seek me early, but they shall not find me: for that they hated knowledge, and did not choose the fear of the Lord: they would have none of my counsel; they despised all my reproof: therefore shall they eat of the fruit of their own way, and be filled with their own devices." Now, "consider this, ye that forget God, lest he tear you in pieces when there is none to deliver."
The other person whom I shall mention was formerly a ploughman, and had enlisted into the army upon account of some love affair. While in the above capacity, he had formed an intimacy with his master's daughter; and, from what I could learn, they were remarkably attached to each other. But the father of the young woman directly opposing his parental authority to their union, the young man took it so much to heart, that he went and joined himself to a party of the Royal Scots as a private soldier; and by this step, he, like too many, punished himself for the fault of another.