'Hoot, Peter,' snorted the Laird, 'the sand in yer sugar's been ower grit! I'm thinkin' I heard tell o' a sma' chuckie stane in Miss Brown's tea-cup. Folk are na juist hens, ye see, an' dinna find sic provender halesome.'

Something like a snigger followed the Laird's sally. No one else present being a 'merchant' of eatables, the joke was greatly relished. It is always pleasant to see a neighbour suffer, because it gives point and relish to one's own immunity. It is a form of childish sensuality that survives the relish for lollipops, but it is perhaps most openly indulged in during the lollipop period. Whispering and restlessness become hushed all over the school-room when a whipping is going forward. Each child settles in its seat to watch the performance, all eyes and interest; the sharper the whish of the cane and the louder the wail of the victim, the more pleasurable and keen the interest of each spectator, for the better he realizes the ease and comfort of his own little skin.

Peter flushed. The laird was a privileged man, who might take his joke as he pleased, but no prescriptive immunity sheltered the rest.

'I see naething to nicker at, Ebenezer Prittie! Gin onything fell amang my sugar I ken naething about it ava, as I'll explain to Miss Brown; but I see na hoo yer ain ellwand can be an inch shorter nor ither folks, an' ye no ken o't.'

'I daur ye to say that again, ye ill-faured leein' rascal! Gin it war na for my godly walk and conversation, as a Christian man an' an Elder, I'd lay the ellwand about yer crappet lugs!'

Here there was a general intervention between the two angry men, and the laird expressed his regret at having used any expression that could disturb the harmony of the meeting, but they knew his weakness for a joke; and as everything seemed to have been said on the subject they had met to consider, and as it was getting late, he would now wish them all good-night.

'I see na that a' has been said,' observed Ebenezer, so soon as the Laird was beyond hearing, 'or that ony thing has been said ava that's ony gude. Are we to let the hale thing drap, an' mak fules o' oursel's afore the hale glen, just to pleasure Auchlippie? I trow no!'

'An' what wad ye be for doin' then?' asked one.

'I'll tell ye what we suld do,' suggested another. 'Isna Mester Dowlas comin' to haud the meetin,' an' lay the fundation o' the new Kirk? An' what for suldna we ca' him to adveese wi' us what ocht to be dune? I'm thinkin' he's as weel able as Auchlippie to direc' folk, an' we needna be feared to anger him, he's no a laird.'

'Aweel!' said Ebenezer, who had now mounted on the top of the tall stool, and was benevolently regarding the meeting from his self-appointed station as chairman. 'Ye'll better juist muive that, Andra Semple, an' as I'm e'y chair I'll put yer motion to the meetin'. An' syne ye can muive an adjournment, Elluck Lamont, an' we'll adjourn to Thursday efternoon, whan the kirk skells. An' sae we'll be a' in order ('let a'thing be dune decently an' in order,' says the Apostle) till we get Mester Dowlas to set us richt.'