“Had it not been the Sabbath day, Mr. Blank,” remarked the preacher, “I would have asked you how the hay was selling in Perth on Friday?”
“Weel, sir,” replied the sessional confrere, “had it no been the day that it is, I wad just hae tell’t ye it was gaun at a shillin’ the stane.”
“Indeed! Well, had it been Monday instead of Sabbath, I would have told you that I have some to sell.”
“Imphm, ay, ou ay, sir. An’ had it been Monday, as ye say, then, I wad just hae tell’t ye I wad gie ye market price for’t.”
The significant nod which the minister gave to this last remark brought the elder with a couple of carts to the manse on Monday morning, and before mid-day the minister’s hay-stack was non est.
These fellows were wise as serpents, though scarcely as innocent as doves.
The Dumfries old lady who was accustomed to employ the wet Sundays in arranging her wardrobe had less cunning. “Preserve me!” she would exclaim, “another gude Sabbath! I dinna ken whan I’m to get thae drawers redd up.”
Dr. Guthrie says “our ancestors might have been too scrupulous. I don’t say they did not fall into glaring inconsistencies” in connection with Sabbath observance, and tells a story of his going to preach for a clerical friend in Ross-shire. Before retiring to rest on Saturday night, he asked his friend if he could get warm water in the morning to shave with.
“Wheesht! wheesht!” returned his host. “Speak of shaving on the Lord’s day in Ross-shire, and you need never preach here again.”
And yet at the same time, in the same locality, a little warm water and whisky would have been supplied on the self-same morning without question, being regarded as a work of necessity and mercy.