'Never mind,' said Sponge, as he wrote it; 'folks like good measure with runs as well as ribbons.'
'Now we must butter old Puff,' observed Spraggon.
'What can we say for him?' asked Sponge; 'that he never went off the road?'
'No, by Jove!' said Jack; 'you'll spoil all if you do that: better leave it alone altogether than do that. Say, "the justly popular owner of this most celebrated pack, though riding good fourteen stone" (he rides far more,' observed Jack; 'at least sixteen; but it'll please him to make out that he can ride fourteen), "led the welters, on his famous chestnut horse, Tappey Lappey."'
'What shall we say about the rest?' asked Sponge; 'Lumpleg, Slapp, Guano, and all those?'
JACK AND MR. SPONGE WRITE AN ARTICLE FOR THE SWILLINGFORD PAPER
'Oh, say nothin',' replied Jack; 'we've nothin' to do with nobody but Puff, and we couldn't mention them without bringin' in our Flat Hat men too—Blossomnose, Fyle, Fossick, and so on. Besides, it would spoil all to say that Guano was up—people would say directly it couldn't have been much of a run if Guano was there. You might finish off,' observed Jack, after a pause, 'by saying that "after this truly brilliant affair, Mr. Puffington, like a thorough sportsman, and one who never trashes his hounds unnecessarily—unlike some masters," you may say, "who never know when to leave off" (that will be a hit at Old Scamp,' observed Jack, with a frightful squint), '"returned to Hanby House, where a distinguished party of sportsmen—" or, say, "a distinguished party of noblemen and gentlemen"—that'll please the ass more—"a large party of noblemen and gentlemen were partaking of his"—his—what shall we call it?'
'Grub!' said Sponge.
'No, no—summut genteel—his—his—his—"splendid hospitality!"' concluded Jack, waving his arm triumphantly over his head.