“Gladstone was a born reformer. For a long time I was pretty sure that Dickens could not have written these books, but I never associated them with Gladstone until one day I happened to hit upon a cipher—as conclusive a one, I think, as any that have been discovered in the works of Shakespeare. Just before this I heard of the finding of the manuscript of a letter written by Gladstone to his firm of publishers, relating to the use of the name ‘Murdstone’ as one of the chief characters in ‘David Copperfield.’ After writing a number of novels Gladstone evidently felt that he would like to leave some more obvious clue to their real authorship than a cipher, and apparently his intention had been to call this character ‘Mirthstone,’ a sort of pun upon his own name. But his publishers must have objected to the device as too transparent, for we find him replying: ‘Very well. Then Murdstone let it be.’ Another clue was afforded by the name of the ‘literary man with a wooden leg’ in ‘Our Mutual Friend,’—Silas Wegg. Here we have the initials in full in their regular order, ‘W. E. G.’
“And now,” continued Lord Bacon, “we come to the real cipher, buried in the first of his longer stories, the ‘Pickwick Papers.’ I call it the Ivy Green Cipher. Why this poem of three stanzas was inserted in this book has long puzzled students of Dickens. The ostensible excuse for its introduction was its recitation at an evening party at Manor Farm, Dingley Dell, by the aged clergyman of the place, name not given, who posed as its author. But the poem has absolutely nothing to do with the plot of the story. Just write these first five lines, as I dictate, will you?
‘Oh, a dainty plant is the ivy green,
That creepeth o’er ruins old,
Of right choice food are his meals I ween,
In his cell so lone and cold.
The wall must be crumbled, the stone decayed—’
“Now, kindly take your pencil and write down the first letter of the first line’s last word, the second letter of the second line’s last word, the third letter of the third line’s third word from the last (a not uncommon variant in ciphers of this character) and the fourth letter of the fourth line’s last word. Those four letters, in this order, spell GLAD. Now glance along the next line for the word that would form the second syllable of a proper name. The next to the last word is STONE. And there you have the conclusive clue to the authorship of the Dickens novels!”
“That seems to be a clincher, your lordship,” I said, “and I am sure your theory will create a sensation down below when the earth-dwellers hear of it. But will you not tell me whether you are the author of ‘Hamlet’ and the other immortal plays?”