"I remarks," says I, "on general principles that you all has come to mourn at the wrong funeral. My obsequies is postponed indefinite."
"Now, Chalkeye," says he, "it's no use arguing, so you want to come out like a man. We're full prepared to give you a decent turn-off, and a handsome funeral."
"I'm sorry to disappoint you, gentlemen, but I has other engagements, and this is my busy day."
I listened to my boys getting ready. "Keep them amused," says Monte; "we need three more loopholes."
"If you don't come out," says Mutiny, "there's going to be trouble, 'cause we're gettin' tired."
"Wall, Mutiny, I'd shorely admire to know some trifling details first, 'cause you've aroused my interest in this yere celebration. Why for is my neck so much in need of stretching?"
"This yere is frivolous argument," says he; "we-all is here to hang you, not to waste time in debates."
"You has my sympathy," says I, "and I shares yo' poignant feelings about not wasting time. What's the use of a necktie social without an appropriate victim? Now thar's young Mose Bowles beside you—which I don't like the look of his neck, the same being much too short for a stand-off collar. What's the matter with hanging Moses Bowles?"
"Come out," says Mose, "or we'll burn your den, you horse-thief!"
"Bein' possessed of genius, Moses, you'll now proceed to set my 'dobe home in flames. The glare of yo' fierce eye is enough to burn brick walls."