“Followin’ your fools’ scheme I wint out into the thrackless desert beyond the barricks. An’ there I met a pious Hindu dhriving a bullock-kyart. I tuk ut for granted he wud be delighted for to convoy me a piece, an’ I jumped in”—
“You long, lazy, black-haired swine,” drawled Ortheris, who would have done the same thing under similar circumstances.
“’Twas the height av policy. That naygur-man dhruv miles an’ miles—as far as the new railway line they’re buildin’ now back av the Tavi river. ‘’Tis a kyart for dhirt only,’ says he now an’ again timoreously, to get me out av ut. ‘Dhirt I am,’ sez I, ‘an’ the dhryest that you iver kyarted. Dhrive on, me son, an’ glory be wid you.’ At that I wint to slape, an’ took no heed till he pulled up on the embankmmt av the line where the coolies were pilin’ mud. There was a matther av two thousand coolies on that line—you remimber that. Prisintly a bell rang, an’ they throops off to a big pay-shed. ‘Where’s the white man in charge?’ sez I to my kyart-dhriver. ‘In the shed,’ sez he, ‘engaged on a riffle,’—‘A fwhat?’ sez I. ‘Riffle,’ sez he, ‘You take ticket. He take money. You get nothin’.—‘Oho!’ sez I, ‘that’s fwhat the shuperior an’ cultivated man calls a raffle, me misbeguided child av darkness an’ sin. Lead on to that raffle, though fwhat the mischief ’tis doin’ so far away from uts home—which is the charity-bazaar at Christmas, an’ the colonel’s wife grinnin’ behind the tea-table—is more than I know.’ Wid that I wint to the shed an’ found ’twas pay-day among the coolies. Their wages was on a table forninst a big, fine, red buck av a man—sivun fut high, four fut wide, an’ three fut thick, wid a fist on him like a corn-sack. He was payin’ the coolies fair an’ easy, but he wud ask each man If he wud raffle that month, an’ each man sez, ‘Yes,’ av course. Thin he wud deduct from their wages accordin’. Whin all was paid, he filled an ould cigar-box full av gun-wads an’ scatthered ut among the coolies. They did not take much joy av that performince, an’ small wondher. A man close to me picks up a black gun-wad an’ sings out, ‘I have ut,’—‘Good may ut do you.’ sez I. The coolie wint forward to this big, fine, red man, who threw a cloth off av the most sumpshus, jooled, enamelled an’ variously bedivilled sedan-chair I iver saw.”
“Sedan-chair! Put your ’ead in a bag. That was a palanquin. Don’t yer know a palanquin when you see it?” said Ortheris with great scorn.
“I chuse to call ut sedan chair, an’ chair ut shall be, little man,” continued the Irishman. “’Twas a most amazin’ chair—all lined wid pink silk an’ fitted wid red silk curtains. ‘Here ut is,’ sez the red man. ‘Here ut is,’ sez the coolie, an’ he grinned weakly-ways. ‘Is ut any use to you?’ sez the red man. ‘No,’ sez the coolie; ‘I’d like to make a presint av ut to you.’—‘I am graciously pleased to accept that same,’ sez the red man; an’ at that all the coolies cried aloud in fwhat was mint for cheerful notes, an’ wint back to their diggin’, lavin’ me alone in the shed. The red man saw me, an’ his face grew blue on his big, fat neck. ‘Fwhat d’you want here?’ sez he. ‘Standin’-room an’ no more,’ sez I, ‘onless it may be fwhat ye niver had, an’ that’s manners, ye rafflin’ ruffian,’ for I was not goin’ to have the Service throd upon. ‘Out of this,’ sez he. ‘I’m in charge av this section av construction.’—‘I’m in charge av mesilf,’ sez I, ‘an’ it’s like I will stay a while. D’ye raffle much in these parts?’—‘Fwhat’s that to you?’ sez he. ‘Nothin’,’ sez I, ‘but a great dale to you, for begad I’m thinkin’ you get the full half av your revenue from that sedan-chair. Is ut always raffled so?’ I sez, an’ wid that I wint to a coolie to ask questions. Bhoys, that man’s name is Dearsley, an’ he’s been rafflin’ that ould sedan-chair monthly this matther av nine months. Ivry coolie on the section takes a ticket—or he gives ’em the go—wanst a month on pay-day. Ivry coolie that wins ut gives ut back to him, for ’tis too big to carry away, an’ he’d sack the man that thried to sell ut. That Dearsley has been makin’ the rowlin’ wealth av Roshus by nefarious rafflin’. Think av the burnin’ shame to the sufferin’ coolie-man that the army in Injia are bound to protect an’ nourish in their bosoms! Two thousand coolies defrauded wanst a month!”
“Dom t’ coolies. Has’t gotten t’ cheer, man?” said Learoyd.
“Hould on. Havin’ onearthed this amazin’ an’ stupenjus fraud committed by the man Dearsley, I hild a council av war; he thryin’ all the time to sejuce me into a fight wid opprobrious language. That sedan-chair niver belonged by right to any foreman av coolies. ’Tis a king’s chair or a quane’s. There’s gold on ut an’ silk an’ all manner av trapesemints. Bhoys, ’tis not for me to countenance any sort av wrong-doin’—me bein’ the ould man—but—anyway he has had ut nine months, an’ he dare not make throuble av ut was taken from him. Five miles away, or ut may be six”—
There was a long pause, and the jackals howled merrily. Learoyd bared one arm, and contemplated it in the moonlight. Then he nodded partly to himself and partly to his friends. Ortheris wriggled with suppressed emotion.
“I thought ye wud see the reasonableness av ut,” said Mulvaney. “I make bould to say as much to the man before. He was for a direct front attack—fut, horse, an’ guns—an’ all for nothin’, seein’ that I had no thransport to convey the machine away. ‘I will not argue wid you,’ sez I, ‘this day, but subsequintly, Mister Dearsley, me rafflin’ jool, we talk ut out lengthways. ’Tis no good policy to swindle the naygur av his hard-earned emolumints, an’ by presint informa-shin’—’twas the kyart man that tould me—‘ye’ve been perpethrating that same for nine months. But I’m a just man,’ sez I, ‘an’ over-lookin’ the presumpshin that yondher settee wid the gilt top was not come by honust’—at that he turned sky-green, so I knew things was more thrue than tellable—‘not come by honust. I’m willin’ to compound the felony for this month’s winnin’s.’”
“Ah! Ho!” from Learoyd and Ortheris.