Mr. Barr had been so very particular in his questions that I made up my mind to the loss of the money expended on my journey and the extinction of my hopes.
"You are young, Miss Anstey, and if you had told me you were fully competent to teach all the 'ologies into which you have dipped, I should have declined your services with thanks, and deeply regretted that I had been the means of bringing you so far. As it is, I believe you will suit us, if you think that such modest surroundings as ours will meet your requirements. I have made many inquiries, and perhaps tried your patience a little, but you will excuse this when you consider the circumstances. To the governess is entrusted the parents' most precious treasures; through her they will receive the instruction which will influence their after lives for good or evil. And my wife and I have a double responsibility resting upon us in making choice of a governess, because the one dear daughter of valued friends will receive the same instruction and impressions as our own children from her lips and life. Mrs. Goulding has told me your past history, and from her I know that you have been a dutiful daughter and are a brave-hearted girl."
"Your own lips have added the information that you are a true one, and that no thought of self-interest would induce you to give a false impression of your powers. You will have to work and study, no doubt, because your little cup of knowledge will be constantly drawn upon. You must try to keep replenishing it."
The revulsion of feeling produced by these kind words, and the knowledge that my journey was not to prove vain, rendered me almost unable to answer. For the first time since I met Mr. Barr, my voice trembled and tears came into my eyes. But I was very glad, and at length I found words to tell him so.
He knew, it seemed, that I might have gone to Westwood Park, for Mrs. Goulding had given him to understand that an engagement with Lady Minshull was absolutely open to me, should I not go to Hillstowe, and he asked me why I chose to come so far on a mere chance of being engaged by him.
"Because I wanted, not only to find employment, but a home," I replied.
"You shall have it at Hillstowe," said Mr. Barr. "I am a poor parson, and my wife and I are hardworking people. All about us is planned for the simple supply of our daily needs. We have no luxuries or superfluities, though I dare say many of our neighbours, looking at our troop of children, would say several of them were superfluous. But my wife is a true mother, and though her heart has so many occupants, she will find room in it for you. We have said nothing about holidays yet, but you will not be dissatisfied because yours are too short. The truth is, we have to send our eldest lads back to school before we have room for the governess, so you will come a day after they leave us, and begin your vacations a day before they commence theirs."
I would rather have heard Mr. Barr say there would be short holidays or none, since I had no real home. But I promptly reflected that, with forty pounds a year, I should be able to find one for myself, if no one invited me. There were always the lodge and Hannah Brown to fall back upon, though it would be terrible to return to the immediate neighbourhood of my old home. However, I was glad at heart, for my mission had sped, and I was not going to meet trouble half-way and on the heels of present success.
Mr. Barr saw me into the return train, and then bade me a kindly farewell, with a promise that I should hear from his wife soon. She wrote to me a few days later, and on the last Monday in January, I parted with my good old nurse, and started for Hillstowe Vicarage. Hannah Brown was very unwilling to receive payment for the homely accommodation afforded me at the lodge, but I took care that she should not lose by her goodness to me. When I reached Hillstowe I had a solitary half-crown left, and no certainty of more until Midsummer. Mr. Baxendell paid half-yearly for his daughter's board and education, and when his cheques came, in June and December, I should receive my share of their value.
Five months was a long time to look forward to when one had no certainty of a shilling beyond the half-crown aforesaid, without begging or borrowing; and against both plans for raising money I determinedly set my face.