"Mr. G—- requests the pleasure of Mr. L —-'s company at dinner, on Tuesday, the 8th of January, at 5 o'clock."
The answer accepting the invitation should run as follows:
"Mr. and Mrs. L—- have much pleasure in accepting Mr. and Mrs. G- —'s kind invitation to dinner on the 8th of January."
If declined, the following form must be used:
"Mr. and Mrs. L—- regret that a prior engagement (or other reason stated) will prevent their accepting Mr. and Mrs. G—-'s kind invitation to dinner on the 8th of January."
Should the invitation be declined, some reason for the refusal must be given, and, unless an excuse (which always savors more or less of the untruthful) be wanted, it is the truest politeness to assign the cause which actually is the preventive. Whatever the cause—sickness, domestic trouble, business or any other—it should be stated as concisely as possible in the answer, which in any case should be dispatched as soon as possible (certainly the next day) after the receipt of the invitation, that the hostess may have time to summon other guests in the stead of those declining her first invitations.
After an invitation is once accepted, it should be scrupulously observed. Nothing but the most absolute necessity should prevent you from going, and when such necessity arises, it should be communicated directly, with a full explanation of the preventing cause even if it is within half an hour of the appointed dinner time. If earlier, send the explanation as soon as possible.
Invitations to dinner and the answers must be sent by a special messenger. The post is proverbially uncertain, and the non-arrival of an expected invitation or its answer, may cause lasting offence.
It is a breach of etiquette, to say nothing of practical inconvenience, to bring an unassorted company together at dinner. Great people, public characters, literary celebrities or distinguished guests from any cause should not be invited merely because they are such. They will be uncomfortable if the guests summoned to meet them are not congenial, and the remainder of your company equally so. No one guest should be too conspicuous. A harmonious blending of tastes and qualities should be the object in view. Persons moving in one circle of society should not, as a general rule, be invited to meet those who move in another circle. A man of strong political bias in one direction, should not be invited to meet a party opposed to his views; persons of known and marked differences in religious matters should not be invited to meet each other, and above all, avoid the social collision of those whom you know to be personal enemies. The best guide in such matters is common sense, coupled with a little judicious forethought.
Invitations to large balls should be sent out at least a fortnight before the time appointed, and are worded thus: