A country auction is a curious sight. It was even more so at the beginning of the century.
Auctions, like funerals, are wet or dry, and a dry auction, like a dry funeral, attracts few assistants and provokes little enthusiasm.
A dry auction is colourless, cold, sordid. Emulation among would-be purchasers is languid, and the sums realised are inconsiderable.
It is otherwise at a wet auction, so entitled because spirits are freely provided and distributed: at that faces glow, hearts warm, competition waxes keen, the humour of the auctioneer sparkles, and the prices fetched by the articles offered are often altogether disproportioned to their intrinsic value. Messrs. Hawkes and Squire were in good repute as capable men who understood how to play upon the tempers of a circle of hesitating purchasers, how to pit one against another, to cover a defect, and enhance the value of an article exposed to sale.
'No,' said Mr. Hawkes, 'that won't do. We must not begin with the 'ouse. We must not bring it in late, with this here drivin' and freezin' wind. We'll do as Mr. Rattenbury proposed, and very sensible it was of him. We'll have out the cloam and the glass and the jugs and togs first, and get 'em up to a lively 'eat, and then run the 'ouse afore they get cold again. There's a rick of firewood, and an old set of harness without an 'oss to wear it, that I can see, and some garding tools, a chopper and a block, and the clinkum clankums as we can bring out. Mr. Squire, you get the liquor well in, ply 'em freely, ripen 'em up before we put up the 'ouse. The order ain't professional, but in such a wind and such a season, and when the space within is limited—it can't be helped. Folks'll be goin' when they get cold.'
'I think we will begin,' said Mr. Squire. 'They have got through a gallon of gin already.'
'Right you are,' responded Mr. Hawkes, and mounted a chair set against the outside of the house near the window, where there was some shelter against the wind. He was a florid man, with very large, white whiskers, and a white hat with a black band round it, all the lower part of his face large and heavy, small dark eyes and dark brows.
Before him were benches, and a table crowded with crockery and sundries grouped into lots.
'Now then, gentlemen and ladies, by your leave, and if you please. Time is up, and the trump of duty calls. I may say, though it may be unprofessional to say it, that in all my career it has never been my good fortune to have had come into my hands the disposal of so eligible and desirable a collection of articles as those which it is my privilege and pleasure to submit to you to-day, together with one of the most desirable and convenient residences ever offered on the south coast of England. Ladies and gentlemen, I will just read over the conditions of sale, so that later on no dispute and difficulty may arise.'