Doctor Jones' Picnic

by S. E. Chapman

"I cannot understand this matter, Doctor," said he. "I have absolutely exhausted the medical science of Europe without the slightest benefit. Here you come from the United States, a new country, and supposed to be very much behind in all matters of science and letters, yet you have done for me and my daughter, as if by magic, what the accumulated science and knowledge of Europe have not been able to do at all. Is your science a mystic or esoteric affair, and are you the only one in possession of the secret?"

"No, indeed, Count Icanovich. So far from my system being esoteric or exclusively my own, I have for many years taught and exemplified to the best of my ability the law by which I am governed in the selection of the remedy. And there are a noble few in my country who are like children sitting in the market, crying, 'We have mourned unto you and ye would not mourn; we have piped unto you and ye would not dance.' By every possible means we have endeavored to induce the dominant school of medicine to investigate our claims, but they simply deride and laugh us to scorn."

"But surely, Doctor, they cannot deny the evidence of their own senses! If you cure that which they cannot, they certainly must heed you. Anything else is unthinkable," exclaimed the Count.

"My dear sir, human nature is past finding out in its capacity for stupidity and foolishness. God gives every man the power to choose good or evil, and no amount of evidence can dispossess him of this elective franchise. Hence he is the arbiter of his own fate. Abraham said to Dives concerning his brethren, 'If they believe not Moses and the prophets, neither will they believe, though one arose from the dead.' Jesus Christ healed the sick, raised the dead, restored the lame, the halt, the blind, in the presence of priests, lawyers, and doctors, the scientists of those days; and they put him to death in precisely the same spirit that they expatriated Samuel Hahnemann for discovering and promulgating the only law of cure in God's universe. Human nature has not changed a particle since the days of Adam and Eve, and it never will be any more nor less than what it is now, except as it is regenerated through the Atonement."

"This is marvelously strange," said the Count musingly. "I do not remember to have heard of your system more than a few times in my life, and then but as something ridiculous or foolish. Cannot something be done to bring it before the public?"

"So far as I know, Count Icanovich, there is not a school in Europe where the tenets of our system are taught. The dominant school of medicine has used its power, and legislation effectually bars us out in every European country. Only in America have we colleges, and even there whatever privileges we enjoy are the results of deadly and uncompromising warfare. So you will understand the difficulties under which we labor."

"It seems, then, that it is simply a matter of ignorance with the laity that your system has not become universally adopted," interposed Professor Gray. "And the 'Regular School,' as they style themselves, is exceedingly active in keeping them thus ignorant."

"That is the state of affairs exactly," cried Dr. Jones. "To illustrate the fact that we have a law of cure, while the so-called Regulars have nothing like it, a certain physician, a number of years ago, sent out twenty letters, ten to prominent men of each school. He sent to each the ordinary price of a prescription, and represented himself as a patient. He detailed precisely the same symptoms to each. Now, if medicine is worthy of being called a science, why should there not have been an answer, and but one answer, as to the remedy indicated in this case?"

"So I have said a thousand times," exclaimed the Count, excitedly. "And I can foretell the denouement so far as the Regular school is concerned: You received as many prescriptions that were totally unlike as there were men of that school who prescribed for you."

"Right, you are, my lord!" shouted the Doctor. "But eight of them responded. No two of their prescriptions at all resembled each other, and the aggregate number of drugs prescribed by them was somewhere near seventy, if I remember correctly. If all these drugs had been put into a jug, the compound would have been a mass of incompatibles that would have poisoned any miserable wretch who was fool enough to take it."