"Diabolus curat," says his Riv'rence.
"Anathema sis," says the Pope.
"Oscula meum pod," says his Riv'rence—but, my dear, afore he could finish what he was going to say, the Pope broke out into the vernacular, "Get out o' my house, you reprobate!" says he, in sich a rage that he could contain himself widin the Latin no longer.
"Ha, ha, ha!—ho, ho, ho!" says his Riv'rence. "Who's the hare now, your Holiness? Oh, by this and by that, I've sacked you clane! Clane and clever I've done it, and no mistake! You see what a bit ov desate will do wid the wisest, your Holiness—sure it was joking I was, on purpose to aggravate you—all's fair, you know, in love, law, and conthravarsy. In troth if I'd thought you'd have taken it so much to heart, I'd have put my head into the fire afore I'd have said a word to offind you," says he, for he seen that the Pope was very vexed. "Sure, God forbid that I'd say anything agin your Holiness, barring it was in fun: for arn't you the father ov the faithful, and the thrue vicar ov God upon earth? And amn't I ready to go down on my two knees this blessed minit and beg your epostolical pardon for every word that I said to your displasement?"
"Are you in arnest that it is in fun you wor?" says the Pope.
"May I never die if I amn't," says his Riv'rence. "It was all to provoke your Holiness to commit a brache ov the Latin that I tuck the small liberties I did," says he.
"I'd have you to take care," says the Pope, "how you take sich small liberties again, or maybe you'll provoke me to commit a brache ov the pace."
"Well, and if I did," said his Riv'rence, "I know a sartan preparation ov chymicals that's very good for curing a brache either in Latinity or frindship."
"What's that?" says the Pope, quite mollified, and sitting down again at the table that he had ris from in the first pluff ov his indignation. "What's that?" says he, "for, 'pon my Epistolical 'davy, I think it 'udn't be asy to bate this miraclous mixthir that we've been thrying to anilize this two hours back," says he, taking a mighty scientifical swig out ov the bottom ov his tumbler.
"It's good for a beginning," says his Riv'rence: "it lays a very nate foundation for more sarious operation: but we're now arrived at a pariod ov the evening when its time to proceed wid our shuperstructhure by compass and square, like free and excipted masons as we both are."