But, that no body of men might suffer, the physicians, I thought, might turn parsons, as there would be a great demand for parsons. Besides, as they would be partakers in the general benefit, they must be sorry fellows indeed if they preferred themselves to the public.
Every one would be married a dozen times at least. Both men and women would be careful of their characters and polite in their behaviour, as well as delicate in their persons, and elegant in their dress, ‘Yesterday, for instance, entered into the holy state of matrimony,’ [we should all speak reverently of matrimony, then,] ‘the right Honourable Robert Earl Lovelace’ [I shall be an earl by that time,] ‘with her Grace the Duchess Dowager of Fifty-manors; his Lordship’s one-and-thirtieth wife.’—I shall then be contented, perhaps, to take up, as it is called, with a widow. But she must not have had more than one husband neither. Thou knowest that I am nice in these particulars. I know, Jack, that thou for thy part, wilt approve of my scheme. As Lord M. and I, between us, have three or four boroughs at command, I think I will get into parliament, in order to bring in a bill for this good purpose. Neither will the house of parliament, nor the houses of convocation, have reason to object it. And all the courts, whether spiritual or sensual, civil or uncivil, will find their account in it when passed into a law. By my soul, Jack, I should be apprehensive of a general insurrection, and that incited by the women, were such a bill to be thrown out.—For here is the excellency of the scheme: the women will have equal reason with the men to be pleased with it. Dost think, that old prerogative Harlowe, for example, must not, if such a law were in being, have pulled in his horns?—So excellent a wife as he has, would never else have renewed with such a gloomy tyrant: who, as well as all other married tyrants, must have been upon good behaviour from year to year. A termagant wife, if such a law were to pass, would be a phoenix. The churches would be the only market-place for the fair sex; and domestic excellence the capital recommendation.