Presently about twenty of the bridegroom’s friends arrive to conduct the bride to her new home. For the first half of the journey the arrangements are made and expenses defrayed by the bride’s parents; for the second half by those of the bridegroom, and it is made on horseback, the bride riding in the middle of the party. Arriving at their destination, the bride is seated on a cushion placed on a raised stand by the side of her husband in the middle of the bridal party. At an auspicious hour a short religious service is performed by the village lama, and the parents or sponsors of the parties offer prayers for the happiness of the union.[3] The bridegroom’s parents then beseech the gods to witness the ceremony of their son’s marriage, and declare that henceforth the bride will be owned by the bridegroom and his brothers alone. For three days the festivities continue, during which time as much as fifty chupan of wine, three oxen, and three pigs are sometimes consumed. The notables among the bridegroom’s friends arrive with presents of scarves, and are entertained by his father.
On the third day the bride exchanges the clothes and jewellery she wore on her arrival, for others supplied by the bridegroom. After a short prayer to the gods the pair are left together, for the first time, and on the following morning the bride begins to apply herself to her household duties. Her brothers and relatives who have accompanied her, return home at the expiration of seven days. [[249]]
SEMARINU AND ADJOINING SNOWY MOUNTAIN.
Some three months after the wedding her parents, accompanied by the chief men among their friends and by servants, arrive with presents of food, and request that their daughter may pay them a [[250]]visit. After being entertained for ten or twelve days, they return home, and are followed some weeks later by the young couple, who are accompanied by a number of female servants bearing presents of scarves, provisions, wine, etc. They remain a month, and on their departure the bride receives from her father a new costume and jewellery, and the husband a complete suit of clothes and the inevitable scarf.
Among the very poor the proceedings are much simplified, the negotiations being conducted by the parents in person.
There is no fixed limit of marriageable age in Tibet. The average age, however, for both sexes, is from fifteen to twenty-five, and frequently the bride is older than the bridegroom.
When parties are desirous of dissolving the marriage bond, the reason for so doing must first be investigated. If the husband be found entirely blameless and willing to live with his wife, but she be resolved to divorce him, she is required to pay double the rin, or price paid for her, as a fine for the dissolution of the marriage contract, called borche and den yo, that is, “divorce fine” and “innocence fine.”[4] In the absence of a marriage contract, the divorce fine fixed by law for the wife to pay amounts to eighteen gold sho, equal to 135 rupees; and for the husband three gold srang, equal to 180 rupees. If the husband’s innocence be doubtful, but the wife’s charges remain unproved, the wife is required to pay as divorce fine a complete suit of clothes, a pair of shoes, a bed-carpet, bed-rug, and a wrapper, and the husband must present to his wife a second scarf and a third article of any kind.
On the other hand, if a wife be found perfectly innocent, and willing to live with her husband, but the husband be resolved to divorce her for no fault of hers, he is required to pay to her twelve gold sho, equal to ninety rupees, as divorce fine, and also yog la, “service wage,” amounting to six pounds of barley for every day and six for every night which she has spent with him from the day of marriage to the date of separation. The husband is also required to return the price of all the clothes and other gifts made to the wife by her friends since the time of their marriage. The divorced woman also takes away with her all jewellery given her by her relatives, but not that given [[251]]to her by her husband. The wife cannot demand the “innocence fine.” If there be children at the time of separation, the father takes the boys, and the mother the girls. If the husband be a man of property, the court may order him to give the divorced wife a certain share of his possessions for the maintenance of the girls. On the other hand, if the wife be possessed of property, she may be required to give something for the maintenance of her sons.
Again, when a marriage is contracted between a man of noble blood and a woman of humble rank, or vice versâ, with the definite understanding that they shall share each other’s good and adverse fortune, their property in case of divorce is to be divided between them according to their faithfulness or guilt, and their amount of mutual presents at the time of union. In cases of divorce between parties who were united at their own wish for the enjoyment of pleasure or merriment, the court should, without regard to the nature of their guilt, divide their property equally between them.[5] In cases of marriage between slaves or serfs, the owner decides their separation or continued union. A man of this class is, for instance, married to a woman who, the owner thinks, might be of some service to him. When the woman is found useless, she is dismissed, being given one-sixth of her husband’s belongings, and her place is supplied by a new wife chosen by the owner.