There's not much else that's new this week. The roads have been in an impassabul condishin for some time, and unless some feller kin invent a patent rite for settin' them up edge ways to drene, I don't believe they'll be scasely settled before the summer solstis. I telled Linkin I never seed such mud in my born days. "Wal," ses he, "let me tell you a story about mud. Virginny can't hold a kandel to Illinoy in that respect. One time a man was travellin' 'long the road jest a little nor-east of Springfield, wen he found a hat layin' in the mud, rite in the middel of the road. He stepped out keerful to get it, and he was all struck up a heep to find a man's hed under it, and he in the mud clean up to his very chin. 'Darn my pectur, nabor, if you ain't in a fix. Cum, let me git hold of you, and I'll help pull you out.' 'No! No!' sed the feller in the mud, spittin' out the dirty water; 'No! No! I don't want your help—much ableeged to you—for I've got a good hoss under me, and he'll fetch me out as sure as preachin!'"
"Wal," ses I, "Kernel, I shan't try to match that story to-day." The truth is, that I didn't feel like it. I've bin kinder under the wether since the bawl. Washington is a terrible place for nager and fever, and all kinds of billyus kemplantes. One of the President's leetle shavers has bin dangrus sick for sum daze, but I hope he'll rekiver.
I got yuere letter tellin' me that sum of yuere subscriburs wanted me to rite a letter every week for yuere paper. Wal, I will, if I kin, but I can't promis sartin. You see an old man nigh on eighty years old don't feel jest limber enuf to rite at any and all times, but wenever I hevn't got the lumbager or rumatiz, and my ideas ain't froze up, you'll heer from me, once in two weeks, and perhaps oftener, wen the weather gets more stedy.
Your friend,
Majer Jack Downing.
LETTER III.
The Major has an Attack of the Ague and Fever—Begins to get the Hang of Matters at Washington—Mr. Lincoln's Improvement in "Military Nollege"—Studying "Stratygims" for Gen. McClellan—The Major Suggests a Difficulty—Mr. Stanton Called on—The Negroes at Port Royal—"The Nigger Teachin Fever"—Deacon Jenkins' Daughter goes to Port Royal to Teach the Negroes.
Washington, March 1st, 1862.
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