“I believe you,” said the stranger. “Sure, ’tis ten years of my life I’d give to own that house,” as he pointed to where blue smoke was curling skywards. “Who built it at all, I’d like to know?”
“Sit down there,” said Micus Pat, as he pointed to a fallen tree, “and I’ll tell you.”
And this is what he told:
“Well, it all happened when His Royal Highness the Czar of Russia came on a visit to the Mayor of Cahermore.”
“That must have been a long time ago,” interrupted the stranger.
“Of course it was,” said Micus. “But, as I was saying, when His Royal Highness came to the town, there was great excitement entirely. Every man, woman, and child put on their Sunday clothes, and never before nor since was there such eating and drinking, nor such dancing and singing. Flags were flying from the windows and the housetops, and the birds in the cages and the birds in the trees sang until they got so hoarse that they couldn’t sing any more. The Czar himself was delighted, and some say that he grew two inches taller from all he had seen: but he wasn’t much of a man at that. He was just an inch or so bigger than yourself, and maybe a bit better looking, but who’d be boasting about such things, anyway? Well, though the Czar was neither big nor small, good looking nor bad looking, all the Grand Dukes and Grand Duchesses were the sight of the world. They too were delighted with themselves and everybody else, and all went well until the Czar was making his speech, and Bryan O’Loughlin taking it down in shorthand.”
“What did he want taking down the speech for?” said the stranger.
“I’m surprised at your ignorance,” said Micus. “Sure you ought to know that the Czar gets all his speeches printed and gives them to his children to read during the cold wintry nights in Russia. There’s so much frost and snow there that His Royal Highness never leaves his children run about the roads to warm themselves, like other children, for fear of their getting chilblains and toothaches.”
“He must be a good father, then,” said the stranger.
“Of course he is,” said Micus, and he proceeded. “Well, the speech was wonderfully worded and loudly applauded, and nearly ended, when a loud report rang out like as if some one was trying to blow up the world—”