"Now on that very night a squall,
Cum up from some'eres — some bad place!
An' blowed an' tore an' reared an' pitched an' all,
— I had to run a race
"Right out o' bed from that hotel
An' git to yonder risin' ground,
For, 'twixt the sea that riz and rain that fell,
I pooty nigh was drowned!
"An' thar I stood till mornin' cum,
Right on yon little knoll of sand,
FreQUENTly wishin' I had stayed to hum
Fur from this tarnal land.
"When mornin' cum, I took a good
Long look, and — well, sir, sure's I'm ME —
That boat laid right whar that hotel had stood,
And HIT sailed out to sea!
"No: I'll not keep you: good-bye, friend.
Don't think about it much, — preehaps
Your brain might git see-sawin', end for end,
Like them asylum chaps,
"For here *I* walk, forevermore,
A-tryin' to make it gee,
How one same wind could blow my ship to shore
And my hotel to sea!"
____ Chadd's Ford, Pennsylvania, 1877.
Uncle Jim's Baptist Revival Hymn.
By Sidney and Clifford Lanier.
[Not long ago a certain Georgia cotton-planter, driven to desperation by awaking each morning to find that the grass had quite outgrown the cotton overnight, and was likely to choke it, in defiance of his lazy freedmen's hoes and ploughs, set the whole State in a laugh by exclaiming to a group of fellow-sufferers: "It's all stuff about Cincinnatus leaving the plough to go into politics FOR PATRIOTISM; he was just a-runnin' from grass!"