I have often wondered how my good friend Judge Willis, K.C., got on with the Norfolk squire when he was appointed to that circuit.
The difference between the Manchester ways of thought and those of Norfolk were very marked, and so were their methods of business. At one place a solicitor began quoting some law from a book, when his opponent got up indignantly and said it was a well-understood local custom that if a solicitor was going to bring a law book, he should give notice to the other side. I agreed that it was a very proper custom, and impounded the law book, feeling strongly that if there was any advantage in the possession of the law book it should be with the Court.
The case went on very well without any law, as it was a running-down case and a not unamusing one. A local ruffian had hired a pony and cart and gone to Sheringham to collect his father’s rents. He took two friends with him, and they seemed to have drunk the rents and smashed up the trap and lamed the pony. The ruffian was a humorist, very stolid and slow, with an added falsetto of his own to the long, drawling Norfolk speech which seemed to amuse the people in court greatly. Neither solicitor could make anything of him, so I thought I would try my hand on him.
“Now, how did the accident happen?” I asked sternly.
“Nay, I doan’t know. I was ’elping to put pony
back i’ sharves. I doan’t know how ’e got out. I think belly band broke.”
“But you must know something about it.”
“Na—ay,” drawled the witness. “I worn’t driving; Bill wor driving.”
“Then if you remember nothing about it, were you drunk?”
“Me drunk?” asked the witness in pained surprise. “What, me drunk! Na-ay, I wor no more drunk nor your lordship.”