Although the War Office, as will be seen, is a department of hard work and great responsibility, still even within its gloomy portals there are now and then incidents and stories of an amusing character. Many years ago, when the late Sir Cornewall Lewis was Minister for War, on one occasion he visited the infantry depot at Warley in Essex, and was shown a handsome room.[78] After admiring its proportions he inquired as to its use, when, suddenly observing a wooden vaulting horse at the far end of the building, he said: 'Oh! I see—the riding school.'
The late Lord Longford, who had seen much active service both in the Crimea and India, was Under-Secretary for War in 1867. He was an excellent administrator, and occasionally very humorous in his minutes. At the period in question it so happened that there were two officers of high rank and position in the War Office who disagreed in their views on almost every subject, and were constantly in collision—on paper. The correspondence became so voluminous, and the difficulty so perplexing, that at length the whole matter was placed before Lord Longford. I am unable to give his exact words, but his minute to Sir John Pakington, then Minister for War, was to the following effect. 'Secretary of State,—This is a very interesting correspondence. From a careful perusal I have arrived at the conclusion that both these gentlemen are in the right. The case is now for your disposal.'
On another occasion, another Under-Secretary wrote a minute as follows: 'Secretary of State,—This is a very important subject. You will observe that the paper is folded the wrong way.' When Sir Henry Storks was Surveyor General of the Ordnance, he was waited upon by an excellent old messenger, who, however, in his conversation was apt to omit his h's. One day he came into the room, and said: 'Sir 'Enery, Mr. Owl wishes to see you.' 'Who?' asked Sir Henry. 'I never heard of him.' 'Beg your pardon—it is Mr. Owl, the Director of Contracts.' 'Oh, Mr. Howell; show him in!'[79]
Some years ago the Minister for War, so it is said, being desirous of acquainting himself with the work of the different branches, visited the various rooms and inquired as to the details. Meeting a gentleman in the passage, he asked at what hour he usually came to his duty. 'Oh!' said the gentleman in reply, 'I usually stroll in about eleven or twelve o'clock.' 'Stroll in,' said the minister, in surprise; 'then I presume you do not leave until a late hour?' 'Well,' replied the gentleman, 'I generally slip off about three o'clock.' 'Slip off at three?' said the minister, much scandalised. 'Pray, sir, may I ask what department you belong to?' 'Certainly,' said the young man; 'I come every Saturday to wind up the clocks!'
I also remember a curious incident which happened to Lord Cardwell, but which is social rather than military. After he had ceased to be minister, it so happened that the wife of one of his former colleagues in the Government gave birth to a child, and Lord Cardwell called to make inquiries. When the butler opened the door, he announced that her Ladyship was going on well. 'A girl?' said Cardwell, inquiringly. 'No, my Lord.' 'Oh, a boy?' remarked Cardwell. 'No, my Lord.' 'Why, surely—' but before he could say more, the butler interposed, 'Beg pardon, my Lord, but it's a little hare' (heir).
FOOTNOTES:
[74] Clode's Military Forces of the Crown, ii. 765.
[75] Clode's Military Forces of the Crown, ii. 251.
[76] See evidence of H.R.H. the Commander-in-Chief (Second Report of Committee of the House of Commons on Army Estimates, 1888, pp. 27, 35, 36, and 52.)