And if there be another name more free,
More fond, than mistress, make me that to thee!”
I think what renders ladies quarrelsome after they are tied, who were so sweet and conciliatory before, is, the natural and inherent spirit of contradiction of which the fair sex are accused. This they are privileged to exercise to its full extent during courtship; and the abrupt transfer of it immediately after the honey-moon might ruffle the temper of an angel!
So it was with my Lord and Lady T.; and every hour added fresh fuel to the flame. She had been Lady Tyrawly only in remainder and expectancy; but possession alters matters extremely in the humour of most people. At length (to continue my pretty simile) the chain became red-hot,—neither of them could bear it longer, and the whole affair ended in a voluntary and most uncomfortable separation! However, it was only for a short time: death, always fond of doing mischief in families, very soon brought them together again; and if such a thing can be conceived as possible in the other world, it is no bad conjecture, that at this very moment my Lord T., the two Ladies T., and Lord Clonmel, are, among a group of other ghosts, thinking what fools men are to give themselves so much uneasiness upon subjects which only pass like shadows, instead of turning their minds to what might be much more material—namely, how to get over their sins when the last assizes come round.
I recollect one of Lord Clonmel’s maxims was, “whatever must be done in the course of the week, always do it on Monday morning:” and in truth, whoever practises that rule, will find it in no slight degree convenient. I never did.
Immediately after I was married, I resided next door to Lord Clonmel, in Harcourt-street. He called on me most kindly, and took me to walk over his fine gardens and lawn; and was so humorous and entertaining, that his condescension (as I then felt it) quite delighted me; but I afterward found out that he made a point of discovering every young man likely to succeed in public life, and took the earliest moment possible of being so civil as to ensure a friend, if not a partisan; and no man wanted the latter more than his lordship.
“Barrington,” said he to me, “you are married?”
“No doubt,” said I, laughingly, “as tight as any person on the face of the earth, my lord.”
“All women in the world,” rejoined his lordship, “are fond of having their own way.”