I shall now endeavour to give my dearest father some idea of my present views and plans. I have, after much time, labour, and trouble, deciphered the letter pretty well. The Danish nobility wish impatiently my return, and implore me not to delay it a day which I can prevent. They wait in eager expectation of my arrival, with his Majesty's compliance and support, to strike the blow, or lose all in the attempt. I went with this letter to the Baron de Lichtenstein. He received himself a letter yesterday from the queen, which orders him to give me another £100 from her own moneys here, and superadded to these two sources, his Majesty has promised to give an order on his Hanoverian Treasury, in case of necessity, to supply me still further. So you see they are all now in earnest. I went to the merchant to-day, on whom my bill (received from the Danish nobility yesterday) was drawn, and he gave me instantly a bank note for £100 sterling, which I now have in my pocket book. How much longer I shall stay in this kingdom I cannot say, nor can the Baron de L—— say with any more certainty than myself. It absolutely and fully depends on his Majesty's orders and pleasure. The baron will see him next Tuesday morning (it is impossible sooner, two councils being held Sunday and Monday at the queen's palace on American affairs), and communicate to him my letter received from the Danish nobility. I shall write a number of queries likewise for Him on Monday, though I should not be surprised if He sees me before my departure. The baron thinks that I shall not be sent away before the 6th or 7th of next month, when his Majesty will have had time to give his full, clear, and mature reply, and some letters are expected from Copenhagen, which will give a little light how to act. I shall be glad if I am delayed yet some 2 or 3 weeks, as the spring opens, and winter will begin to retire every day. 'Tis terrible to cross Westphalia and Hanover at this season of the year; but that is nothing.
I presume you will now begin to imagine my scheme less romantic, and my views more probable, than they have hitherto appeared; but believe me, my dearest sir, on my honour, I am no more elated now than I was depressed 12 days ago, when things had a very dubious, uncertain aspect. If I return, and if the queen should be reinstated, I may, and I think, must be rewarded in some way—honorary, or otherwise; but I depend on nothing, and hold it as loose as ever I did; yet I now hope and believe I shall go back to Zell, Hamburgh, and perhaps Copenhagen; but still I can positively assert nothing till I have His reply and commands for my departure.
Though I have this hundred pounds now in my possession, yet I consider it a sacred deposit, not to be touched or infringed on till I begin my journey from hence, or the expenses immediately necessary to it. Even my own interest would lead me to be very scrupulous and honourable on this point. My reward is not yet come: it is to come, perhaps, bye-and-bye.
No. 2.
Jan. 23rd, 1775.
And now respecting the grand affair. I conversed two hours with the baron this morning. He hopes to see his Majesty to-morrow evening, or Wednesday morning. I then shall know his ultimate pleasure and commands. The baron has, however, requested me to write in cypher to the Danish nobility to-morrow, that "I have received their money: that, according to all appearances and probability I shall leave London on my return about the first day or week in February, and shall take the direct road to Zell, and thence to Hamburgh." He likewise writes the same to Her to-morrow. I have drawn up a paper of articles to be presented to his Majesty by the baron when he obtains audience, which will contain his reply and argument. In my own opinion, I own, it seems as far as human foresight can now determine, that I shall be sent away in the course of next week: but nothing is sure, nothing to be depended on, till his Majesty's answer and orders are known. Then, I've demanded four days or five, to be ready and prepare my little affairs. A carriage I must buy in Rotterdam or Utrecht, as no carriage can pass by the packet from hence. I've a servant in readiness, whom I can engage the minute I've my despatch or orders to be gone. 'Tis very probable I shall be sent on from Hamburgh to Copenhagen, to give notice then to the party of his Majesty's full consent. Then business will begin. God grant it may be successful! If we are, I may then presume to hope and think I shan't be forgotten.
No. 3.