"Sir,
"I am surprised, that you lose your time in complimenting the dead, when you may make your court to the living. Let me only tell you in the ear, Alexander and Cæsar (as generous as they were formerly) have not now a groat to dispose of. Fill your table with good company: I know a person of quality that shall give you £100 for a place at it. Be secret, and be rich.
"Yours,
You know my hand."
This gentleman seems to have the true spirit, without the formality of an under courtier; therefore I shall be plain with him, and let him leave the name of his courtier, and £100 in Morphew's hands: if I can take it, I will.
My citizen writes the following:
"Mr. Isaac Bickerstaff,
"Sir,"Your Tatler of September 13,[214] am now reading, and in your list of famous men, desire you not forget Alderman Whittington, who began the world with a cat, and died worth three hundred and fifty thousand pounds sterling, which he left to an only daughter, three years after his Mayoralty. If you want any further particulars of ditto Alderman, daughter, or cat, let me know, and per first will advise the needful. Which concludes,
"Your loving Friend,
Lemuel Ledger."
I shall have all due regard to this gentleman's recommendation; but cannot forbear observing, how wonderfully this sort of style is adapted for the despatch of business, by leaving out insignificant particles: besides that, the dropping of the first person is an artful way to disengage a man from the guilt of rash words or promises. But I am to consider, that a citizen's reputation is credit, not fame; and am to leave these lofty subjects for a matter of private concern in the next letter before me.
"Sir,
"I am just recovered out of a languishing sickness by the care of Hippocrates,[215] who visited me throughout my whole illness, and was so far from taking any fee, that he inquired into my circumstances, and would have relieved me also that way, but I did not want it. I know no method of thanking him, but recommending it to you to celebrate so great humanity in the manner you think fit, and to do it with the spirit and sentiments of a man just relieved from grief, misery, and pain; to joy, satisfaction, and ease: in which you will represent the grateful sense of
"Your obedient Servant,
T. B."
I think the writer of this letter has put the matter in as good a dress as I can for him; yet I cannot but add my applause to what this distressed man has said. There is not a more useful man in a commonwealth than a good physician; and by consequence no worthier a person than he that uses his skill with generosity, even to persons of condition, and compassion to those who are in want: which is the behaviour of Hippocrates, who shows as much liberality in his practice, as he does wit in his conversation and skill in his profession. A wealthy doctor, who can help a poor man, and will not without a fee, has less sense of humanity than a poor ruffian, who kills a rich man to supply his necessities. It is something monstrous to consider a man of a liberal education tearing out the bowels of a poor family, by taking for a visit what would keep them a week. Hippocrates needs not the comparison of such extortion to set off his generosity; but I mention his generosity to add shame to such extortion.
This is to give notice to all ingenious gentlemen in and about the cities of London and Westminster, who have a mind to be instructed in the noble sciences of music, poetry, and politics, that they repair to the Smyrna Coffee-house[216] in Pall Mall, betwixt the hours of eight and ten at night, where they may be instructed gratis, with elaborate essays by word of mouth on all or any of the above-mentioned arts. The disciples are to prepare their bodies with three dishes of Bohea, and purge their brains with two pinches of snuff. If any young student gives indication of parts, by listening attentively, or asking a pertinent question, one of the professors shall distinguish him, by taking snuff out of his box in the presence of the whole audience.