In this time she testified she experienced great affliction both of body and mind; but at length, like Hagar, she was enabled to see Him who had seen her in all her affliction, and not only to see him in the works of creation, but also in the works of his providence; and her mind was enlightened to see into the nature and largeness of her sins. She also testified, that the view of eternity and of eternal consequences, so distressed her mind, that it swallowed up her present distress, and so she was induced to give up the lesser, and attend to the greater; namely, to find peace and rest in the life to come: she was enabled to go on in search after truth, until she experienced peace of mind, and evidence of pardon for all her sins, which was her greatest concern till death.
Now the number of years that we were parted, mother and I, was about eighteen; except that once in a great hurry, I travelled more than a hundred miles to see her; at the same time I left keeping of a saw mill, my wife, and young child about a mouth old, and taking with me seventeen or eighteen dollars, which all became a sacrifice with my time, to the relief of my mother; but I was favoured to find that satisfaction, which I esteemed more than time or money.
Now it came to pass after eighteen years, my mind was visited with a concern to go to Africa, after that Paul Cuffee had been there, and brought good tidings from that place;[2] therefore I thought it good to put out my children in good families, where they could get some schooling, and learn how to work, and then get my wife in with some good sort of people; and being advised to wait till it should seem proper to recommend me to that service, I thought it right to engage in some profitable business, and was hired to attend a mill; in which time the case of my mother came before me, and I sent for her to the State of Delaware from New Jersey; and when brought together, it was indeed like heaven on earth begun; we could sit and tell of the dangers and difficulties we had been brought through; so my mother was favoured to end her days with me: she, like my grandmother lived to a great age, and appeared weary of affliction, and of this troublesome world; her mind became disordered; she desired a short illness, which was granted; she died the third day after she was taken sick, with very little complaint or struggle; but was thought to have fallen asleep.
FOOTNOTES:
[1] The reader will observe, that Solomon frequently makes use of the pronoun “thee,” when addressing an individual; this occurs simply from the circumstance, that it is a mode of speech not unusual in some parts of America, with people of different denominations; and does not arise from any connexion that he has ever had with the societyof friends.
R. H.
[2] This concern was doubtless of a religious character: the death of the pious and enterprising Paul Cuffee, was the probable cause of the visit being relinquished.
R. H.