New Homes for Old

by Sophonisba Preston Breckinridge

There is, however, a feature of the wedding feast which reduces the cost to the family. It is customary, when the party is assembled after the wedding, for the bride to be placed on a "throne," and the guests place their presents of money in her lap. Money is usually given, although useful articles for the home are sometimes included. The greater the number of guests invited perhaps the lower the net cost of the ceremony.

The other principal expense of the Italian bride's family is for the bridal linen and the girl's underwear. These, of course, vary with the circumstances of the family. These articles are usually the accumulation of several years.

The bridegroom pays the other costs. He buys not only the household furniture and his clothing, but the wedding ring, earrings, a gift for the bride, and some of her clothing. If the girl is poor he may even buy her underwear and the linens. It is said that these things often cost all the bridegroom's savings, and that the couple start married life with nothing saved for emergencies. The expense of the bridegroom in a recent Italian wedding in Chicago was $2,000.

It is the custom for the man to buy for the bride a complete costume for two days—the wedding day and the eighth day—when the newly married couple return the calls of the wedding guests. An Italian saleslady in a store in the Italian district says that the amount usually spent on the bride's clothes is $200 or $250. The very least spent in these days is $100, and the outfit may cost as much as $500. When the family is a recently arrived one, the man usually accompanies the girl or her mother to the store and pays the bills on the spot.

Among other groups as well as among the Italians it seems to be customary for the bridegroom to bear part of the expense of the wedding and of the bride's outfit. The Polish bridegroom often gives $50 to the bride, and she buys her clothes, linens, and the food for the feast. The Russian girl gives a white handkerchief to the groom, and he pays for her dress.

Another item in the expenses of a wedding is the cost of photographs. It is the custom in most foreign-born groups to have large photographs, not only of the bride and groom, but of the whole wedding party. The Polish people also have another picture of the bridesmaid taken with the best man. These photographs cost as much as $30 a dozen and at a higher rate if less than a dozen are ordered. The number ordered depends on the economic condition of the family, but the minimum is six of each. The pictures of the bridal party are the largest and most expensive and are usually given only to the immediate family and the attendants. The smaller pictures of the bride and groom are given to all the friends and relatives, especially those in the old country. This is an important means of keeping up the connection with those at home. An enlarged and colored copy framed in an ornate gilt frame is usually ordered for the newly married couple, and is an added expense.

The cost of automobiles is also important. The bridal party, and sometimes the guests whom it is desired to honor, are taken to the church, then to the photographer's, and then to the hall where the feast and dance are held. Sometimes as many as six automobiles are observed drawn up in front of one of the little photographers' shops in an immigrant district.

Many people seem to think that the festivities among the foreign born are becoming simpler. The extravagance is perhaps again a question of the transition to a money economy. The ceremony in the old country was an occasion for great celebration, with feasting and dancing for several days, but was perhaps not expensive when the necessary articles were produced at home or received in exchange for home products. Here the immigrant family does not at first realize the real value of the money which seems so plentiful, and the old customs are not only carried out, but elaborated because of the added feeling of prosperity.

In many ways the old customs are now being modified. Among the Polish, for instance, the guests used to give presents of money, practically buying a dance with the bride. The custom has been frequently abused here, as the men have divided their gifts into small parts and demanded many dances with the bride, often causing her to dance so much as to cause serious fatigue. For this reason we heard of one bride who simply "walked with the plate" instead of dancing. Another story is told of a wedding in a Polish community, at which the men threw dollars at a plate. The one who was successful in breaking the plate might dance with the bride.

This Polish custom of giving money gifts offsets to a large extent the cost of the wedding. Among three Polish families visited, one whose wedding cost $200 collected $60; another spent $150 and collected $160; and a third spent $200 and collected $300. But this custom, too, tends to disappear in the second generation. A young Russian couple, for instance, were opposed to a regular collection, but the parents, who consider it the blessing to their daughter, could not resist each leaving a ten-dollar bill as they left. The young people were embarrassed, but the other guests quickly followed the suggestion, and $100 was collected.