Go on.
Ebbsmith.
“As soon as the doors were opened the place of meeting—the Iron Hall, Carter Street—was filled with a compact body of roughs assembled from the neighbouring streets, and there seemed every prospect of disorderly scenes. The appearance of Mrs. Ebbsmith on the platform was greeted with cheers and cries of ‘Mad Agnes!’” Surely, my dear, you must recognise that my professional reputation is endangered when my wife is reported in the newspapers as addressing meetings in discreditable parts of London, where her appearance is greeted with shouts of ‘Mad Agnes!’
Agnes.
Nonsense! Who is likely to read an obscure paragraph like that?
Ebbsmith.
Obscure paragraph! My dear Agnes, the Standard has a leading article on it. Listen to this:—“Mrs. Ebbsmith’s crusade against the institution of marriage is again attracting unfavourable attention. Last night in St. Luke’s she once more attempted to ventilate her preposterous schemes ... crack-brained crusade ... bellowing revolutionary nonsense on obscure platforms.... This absurd visionary, whom her audiences not inappropriately nickname ‘Mad Agnes’.... Ultimately the meeting had to be broken up by the police.... We cannot understand how a man in Mr. Ebbsmith’s position can allow himself to be made ridiculous.” [Almost weeping.] I do think they might leave my name out of it. In a leading article too!
Agnes.
Is there any more of the stuff?