And this motion was carried with acclamation. No evidence was offered or asked as to the extent of the man’s guilt, or indeed if he was guilty at all!
The meeting had a grim sense of humour, and enjoyed nothing more than really elaborate foolery. Such as, for example, the celebrated case of Pio Chino’s bronco.
301Pio Chino was a cargador running a train of pack-mules into some back-country camp. His bell mare was an ancient white animal with long shaggy hair, ewe neck, bulging joints, a placid wall eye, the full complement of ribs, and an extraordinarily long Roman nose ending in a pendulous lip. Yet fifteen besotted mules thought her beautiful, and followed her slavishly, in which fact lay her only value. Now somebody, probably for a joke, “lifted” this ancient wreck from poor Chino on the ground that it had never been Chino’s property anyway. Chino, with childlike faith in the dignity of institutions, brought the matter before the weekly court.
That body took charge with immense satisfaction. It appointed lawyers for the prosecution and the defence.
Prosecution started to submit Chino’s claim.
Defence immediately objected on the ground that Chino, being a person of colour, was not qualified to testify against a white man.
This point was wrangled over with great relish for an hour or more. Then two solemn individuals were introduced as experts to decide whether Chino was a man of colour, or, as the prosecution passionately maintained, a noble, great-minded and patriotic California member of the Caucasian race.
“Gentlemen,” the court addressed this pair, “is there any infallible method by which your science is able to distinguish between a nigger and a white man?”
“There is,” answered one of the “experts.”
“What?”