His tone was not excited; it was quiet and sweet; but Mrs. Dallas was excited.
'A free man? My boy, what are you saying? Were you not always free?'
'No, mother. I was in such bonds, that I have been struggling for years to do what was right—what I knew was right—and was unable.'
'To do what was right? My boy, how you talk! You always did what was right.'
'I was never Christ's servant, mamma.'
'What delusion is this!' cried Mrs. Dallas. 'My son, what do you mean? You were baptized, you were confirmed, you were everything that you ought to be. You cannot be better than you have always been.'
He smiled, stooped down and kissed her troubled face.
'I was never Christ's servant before,' he repeated. 'But I am His servant now at last, all there is of me. I wanted you to know at once, and Miss Frere, I wanted her to know it. She asked me yesterday whom I was fighting? and I saw directly that I was fighting a won battle; that my reason and conscience were entirely vanquished, and that the only thing that held out was my will. I have given that up, and now I am the Lord's servant.'
'You were His servant before.'
'Never, in any true sense.'