What a Young Husband Ought to Know

by Sylvanus Stall

CHAPTER II.

DIFFERENCES OF SEX.

It is both difficult and unnecessary to determine which is the superior of the two sexes. When the subject is regarded in its true light there is no superiority upon the part of either, and at the same time each is superior to the other in the sphere in which God designed them to move. The truth was perhaps aptly represented by President Lincoln when presented at the same time with two hats by rival hatters. Both hats were about as perfect as it was possible for human skill to make them. He desired to recognize this perfection in both, and yet to avoid discrimination in favor of either, and in that matchless sufficiency which qualified him for the demands of almost any situation, Mr. Lincoln, in accepting the hats, said: "Gentlemen, your hats mutually excel each other." The same is true of men and women; they mutually excel each other. In man's place, he is superior; and in woman's place, she is superior. The wisdom with which God has adapted each for the important place which they are to occupy in life is well worth our thought and study, and a clear apprehension of the subject will help to remove many of the misunderstandings, estrangements and conflicts which so frequently arise in married life.

That neither is superior to the other, but that they are two parts of one complete whole, segments of the same circle, and that their union is absolutely essential to unity and entirety, will be best understood as we study what these differences are. In some respects man is inferior to woman, while in other respects woman is inferior to man. In a happy marriage these differences become complemental, rendering possible that superior unity in which the two are made one. Let us note what some of these differences are.

In stature, woman is shorter than man. In the United States the average height of men is about five feet eight inches, and the weight about one hundred and forty-five pounds. The average woman is about five feet three inches in height, and about one hundred and twenty-five pounds in weight. The normally-developed man has broad shoulders and narrow hips, while woman has narrow shoulders and broad hips. Her shoulders set further back, giving her breast greater depth. In effecting this change her collar-bone is shorter, and this is one reason why she cannot throw a stone or ball with as much accuracy as man. In man the muscles are well defined, and indicate great strength, while in woman, even when the muscles are well developed, the outlines are more hidden by fatty and cellular tissues, which fill all the hollows and round off all angles, giving her peculiar grace and beauty. He has greater muscular force, but she has more power of endurance. The bony structure of woman is smaller, and more delicately formed. The angles of the bones are less projecting, and the joints better concealed. The skull is smaller, and the bones of the cranium thinner. The sternum, or breastbone, is shorter and flatter, and the clavicles, or collar-bones, more crooked and shorter. His voice is deeper and more guttural; hers softer and more musical. Her neck is longer, her skin softer, her hair less generally diffused but more luxuriant in growth than in man.

The most noticeable feature in the study of the differences of the bony structure of the two sexes is observable in the pelvis—a word derived from the Greek, signifying dish or bowl. In man this structure is simply to subserve the purposes of strength and motion. In woman this bony basin, which forms the lower part of the body, has an additional purpose of special importance. At her side the hip-bones form the highest points, and from these the pelvis slopes down until in front it forms a comparatively narrow rim called the pubic arch. This change of form in woman is designed to adapt her body to become the first cradle of her children, and in the fullness of time to permit the easy transit of a new being into the outer world. In preparing woman for maternity, God has thus equipped her with such physical adaptation as is suited to the carrying of her temporary burden, while at the same time affording protection for the hidden life within, thus fitting the physical frame of woman to the mother-nature with which He has endowed her.

While woman is thus furnished with physical requisites suited to the easiest accomplishment of the divine purpose—while the form of her body, the articulation of her bones and the size of her muscles all indicate her sense of dependence upon man—God has, with like wisdom, adapted man in all of his physical endowments to become the shield and defender of woman. He is to be her protection and her defense. His fiercer visage, his broader shoulders, his more muscular frame, all speak clearly of the divine purpose.

Intellectually, as well as physically, men and women are best suited for their respective duties and responsibilities in life. In arriving at a conclusion, man is much more deliberate and logical, proceeding step by step after an orderly method; while woman reaches the conclusion in much less time by means of her intuition. While woman is by no means incapable of logical deductions, yet generally she does not stop to reason it out, but takes refuge in the statement that she "knows that it is so;" that she is "sure that she is right." It is easy to see that intellectually, as well as physically, men and women are complemental, and when the conclusions arrived at are identical they become confirmatory of each other. While men would be likely to prefer the conclusions which are reached by their own method, yet women in the exercise of the same freedom are likely to prefer the intuitions of their own sex. For either to decide in favor of the intellectual superiority of their own sex would be somewhat like the case of two men engaged in a lawsuit, where one takes it upon himself to become umpire and decide in favor of himself and against his opponent.

The nervous system of woman is more refined and more delicate than that in man. This greater nervous sensibility renders her more susceptible to impressions, enables her to dwell constantly in the realm of more refined susceptibilities, rendering distasteful to her all things that are coarse and low, and at the same time endowing her with a greater capacity both for pleasure and for pain. Man's sources of pleasure are not always hers, but in love of her home and its adornment, in love of her children and their well-being, of literature, art, music and religion, she usually surpasses man, save in exceptional cases.

To enable woman, with her finer nervous sensibilities, to meet the larger burden of pain and suffering which is laid upon her, God has adequately fitted her by bestowing a compensating power of endurance. If we desire to deny woman this greater sensitiveness and greater endurance we would need to ignore the patience and bravery with which they face and bear the pains and perils of maternity—pains and sufferings of which they assert that man cannot form the remotest idea.