Mr. W. Ferdinand, in Heaven's name, do not trifle with such a subject as this. Have you reflected what, if anything happened to your aunt, I should be?
Fer. The very man I want—the first felon. I should immediately apply to the State for permission to continue my researches.
Mr. W. Ferdinand, for pity's sake, keep me in suspense no longer. Produce your remedy. Where, oh, where is your antidote?
Fer. (mockingly). Where, oh, where is my doting aunty? Ha! ha! pretty play upon words, isn't it? Have another glass of wine. (Drinks.)
Mr. W. No more wine for me. I have drunk my last glass of wine, and I have smoked my last cigar. Never did I anticipate such horrors as now consume me. Ferdinand, if you have any pity for an old man—
Fer. My dear uncle, I can see I'm going too far. You shouldn't give me such good wine, and so develop my propensities for practical joking. We'll thaw the old woman at once.
Mr. W. My dear boy, how you relieve me! Yes, at once—at once. Never mind the smell of smoke and the decanters. Compared to my present feelings, her abuse will be a perfect treat.
Fer. (feeling his pockets). Hullo!
Mr. W. What's the matter?
Fer. Well, don't be alarmed; but I seem to have mislaid the other bottle.