Mr. W. (groaning). Oh, don't! don't!
Mrs. W. I heard you, Mr. Watmuff, express your determination to possess yourself of a duplicate to that key. (Mr. Watmuff groans.) I heard you descend to the wine vaults, and was conscious of your return with beakers and flagons containing wine. (Mr. Watmuff groans.) I was conscious of the vile odor of tobacco pervading these rooms, which hitherto I had kept free from such pollution; and, mark this well, Mr. Watmuff, I was more than conscious when the smoke from your cigar, ejected from your lips, designedly suffused my countenance.
Mr. W. Oh, this is too much! Ferdinand, do me a kindness. You are on the look-out for some one who does not object to be frozen. In the interests of science, I'm quite prepared to immolate myself. Freeze me, and I'll bless you as long as you keep me frozen.
Mrs. W. (approaching Emily and Walter). Lastly, I was conscious when these dear ones (embraces them) revealed themselves to me in their true colors, and I learned that it was consistent with my duty to my parents to give them my blessing.
Emily. I need not tell you, papa, how happy this makes me.
Mr. W. I'm very glad, my dear, to know that one member of the family is likely to be happy. Now, Ferdinand, I'm quite ready. Freeze me.
Fer. With pleasure. You will feel one sharp prick in the lobe—
Mrs. W. Hold, hateful trifler with the sacred laws of nature! Is such a man as that fit to be frozen? I will freeze you when we are alone, sir! Ah, sad it is, when the old must be taught by the young, and that the daughter's lot should be happier than the mother's! (To Emily.) And yet, my child, I do not grudge you your happiness, and am glad at heart to think that you will have a husband who declined to take part in the diabolical scheme for Freezing his Mother-in-Law.
CURTAIN.