"Thou shalt not covet ... nor his ox, nor his ass, nor anything dangerous!"
"Thou sha't not Bow Dean!"—Still affecting the Commandments, though a story of another colour, is the following:—
In a village in Yorkshire dwelt the two granddaughters of a former vicar. These good ladies often met in the streets the children who attended the village school. On such occasions they expected the latter to acknowledge them—the boys by raising their hats and the girls by curtseying. Now one sturdy urchin often disregarded the ladies, and they accordingly spoke to his father respecting his conduct. The parent questioned the boy, and soon found out that the complaint laid against him was true. On being asked why he did not lift his cap, the culprit replied, "Ah dean't think ah ou't ta dea sa. Dean't us larn at t' skeal, 'Thou sha't not bow dean ta ony graven image'?"
In Braid Yorkshire.—The diocesan inspector was questioning a class of boys about the story of Joseph as a slave, interpreter, &c., and incidentally asked the following question: "What did Joseph's father think when the brothers brought Joseph's coat covered with blood?" The reply of a small boy quite upset the official's gravity: "Please, sir, he thought a coo had tupped him!"
On Bread and Chicken.—Imagine the surprise of the schoolmistress when a little lad, in giving his version of the "Temptation," informed her that Christ partook of bread and chicken in the wilderness. Judicious questioning elicited the fact that the young hopeful had based his opinion upon two extracts: "Man shall not live by bread alone," and "Get the hens, Satan!"
Three Evils.—It was the annual Scripture examination, and the inspector was questioning a class upon the Catechism. "It was promised for you in your baptism," said the official inquisitor, "that you would fight against three great evils. Tell me what they are." "My godfathers and godmothers," was the reply of one youth.