“A society has lately been started at Saint Dominic’s for the preservation and management of Guinea-pigs and Tadpoles. The following are some of the rules to be observed:—
“Any one owning a Guinea-pig or Tadpole is to be responsible for washing it with soap and hot water at least twice a day.
“Any one owning a Guinea-pig or Tadpole is to supply the rest of the school with cotton wool and scent.
“No Guinea-pig or Tadpole is on any account to use hair oil or grease which has not been sanctioned by a joint committee of the Fifth, Sixth, and masters.
“During the approaching winter, every one possessing a Guinea-pig or Tadpole shall be at liberty, providing it is regularly washed, to use it as a warming-pan for his own bed.”
The small tribe of furious juniors who as usual had crowded round the paper on the morning of publication to get “first read,” broke forth at this point into a howl of exasperation.
“They won’t! I’ll see they won’t use me as a warming-pan, won’t you, Padger? The brutes! I’ll bite their horrid cold feet if they stick them against me, that’s what I’ll do.”
“I’ll keep a pin to stick into them,” said another.
“I’ll get some leeches and put on their legs,” shouted another.
“I’ll tell you what,” said Stephen, changing the subject, “it’s cool cheek of them calling us ‘it,’ as if we were things.”