“Oh, that, you know, is quite a different thing,” answered the cashier, smilingly.
“Whar’s the difference in principle?” persisted the man from Coosa. “If a govuhment bond foh $1,000 air good secuhity foh $900, what is the reason that a piece of land wuth $1,000 kain’t be good secuhity foh $500?”
“The bond,” said the cashier, “could always be sold at par. It is not so easy to find a purchaser for land, even at half its value; it might be worthless, you know.”
“I am not supposin’, suh, that the govuhment would loan money on wuthless land any moah than on counterfeit bonds. I’m talkin’ about sich land as ain’t wuthless, and kain’t evah be wuthless. I’m talkin’ about land that has an airnin’ capacity, when human labor is applied to it. I allow that sich land, when valooed honestly, and not countin’ any buildings or improvements, or anything that can be burned up or carried away—I allow that sich land is just as good security foh a loan of half its value, as any govuhment bond is security foh a loan of nine-tenths its valoo. If the land ain’t wuth nothin’, I’d like to know what the bond is wuth? As I argefy, all the valoo’s on the yearth, suh, bonds and banks and govuhments theyselves rest upon the land and the labah that tills it.”
“But the amount of national bank notes that can be issued on government bonds is limited by law,” remonstrated the cashier.
“Suppose they be. Kain’t the govuhment limit the amount of greenbacks it would loan on the fahms? Kain’t it allot jest so much to each State or to each county, or to each numbah of folks? I don’t see no use of a limit nohow. Govuhment don’t limit the bales of cotton or bushels of cohn, or numbah of hogs a man can raise, noh the tons of ihon he shall smelt, noh the numbah of days’ wuk he shall do in a yeah. What foh do they want to limit the numbah of dollahs that shall be made? Why not leave that to be settled outside of papah laws? If you raise cohn for which there is no demand you kain’t sell it, and if you print dollahs for which there is no demand you kain’t lend them. A dollah ain’t got no nateral valoo nohow. Ye kain’t eat it, noh drink it, noh weah it. Ye kain’t sleep on it, noh ride it, noh drive it around. A dollah is just a yahdstick foh the cloth, a scale foh the sugah, a quart measure foh the vinegah. Suppose govuhment went to limitin’ the numbah of weighin’ scales and yahdsticks and gallon cans thar should be in the land, and then didn’t allow enough to be made foh to go around!—A nice fix the country stohs would be in wouldn’t they? You city folks would corral all the yahdsticks, and all the scales, and all the pint pots that the govuhment allowed to be made. You’d organize measurin’ companies and bowwow all the scales that the govuhment made, and pay nothin’ to the govuhment for the use of them; and then you’d hiah them out to folks at a big rent, and make the folks as hiad them leave half the measures on deposit with you, and you’d hiah that half again to other folks, and you’d squeeze the people, and squeeze ’em, and squeeze ’em, until you turned every man who wasn’t an ownah of measurin’ tools into a puffeck slave to them as was ownahs. That’s what you hev been a doin’ with us right along. I mean no disrespeck to you, suh, puhsonally, for you have treated me moh politely than a bankah usually treats his bowwowin’ customahs; but you bankahs and capitalists have jest been a monkeyin’ with the currency until you have got every fahmah, and wukin’ man, and stoahkeepah in the country tied hand and foot, with no chance to wuk at all unless they wuk foh you. We have been a lot of everlastin’ fools, suh, to stand it, and we aint a goin’ to stand it much longah.”
“What will you do about it, Mr. Turpin?” said the cashier, quietly, but with a shade of satire in his tone.
“I allow, suh, that we’ll tell the yawpers who run political conventions to get along without our votes, and we’ll elect men to the Legislatoor and to Congress, and mebbe a President, who’ll take their ideahs from the fahmas and wukahs of the Sooth and West, and who won’t go to Wall Street foh ohdahs; and we’ll give all the old questions a rest, and we’ll make it lonesome for the politicians who fight us, and we’ll kind o’ resolute that so long as this govuhment won’t let any State or any puhson go into the business of manufacturing money to supply the necessary wants of the people, it is likely that the govuhment itself ought to do it, and we’ll fix it so that no man who is willin’ to wuk as I am, and knows how to wuk as I do, and has land to plow as I have, will have to see his land lie fallow, and his boys loafin’ around, just bekase he kaint bowwow from nobody, even at ten per cent a yeah, one-fifth of the valoo of his land, to buy a few mules, and a plow or two, and some seed cohn.”
“You will compel the government to go into the business of printing and loaning all the money that anybody wants, will you?” said the cashier.
“Well, suh, I’m no bankah, and no lawyah, but I take it that it is the business of govuhment to provide all the money necessary foh the use of the people, and if the govuhment itself won’t do it, then let it untie the cohds it has put around States and people, and suffah them to do it foh theyselves.”