For if Tars should swig water by nature

The sea would have never been salt!—

Then off with it into a jorum,

And make it strong, sharpish, or sweet,

For if I’ve any sense of decorum

It never was meant to be neat!—

One day when I was but half sober,—

Half measures I always disdain—

I walk’d into a shop that sold Soda,

And ax’d for some Water Champagne;—