To the same. (See vol. i. [312].)
Lest that the rumours of our troubles trouble you above measure, dear sister, I thought good in these few words to signifie unto you that our esperance is yet good in our God, that he for his great names sake will give such success to this enterprise as nether shall these whom he hath appointed to sigh in this be utterlie confounded, neither yet that our enemies shall have occasion to blaspheme the verity, nor yet triumph over us in the end. We trusted too much, dear sister, in our owne strenth, and speciallie since the erle of Arran and his friends were joyned to our number. Amongst us also were such as more sought the purse than Christ’s glory. Wee by this overthrow are brought to acknowledge, what is a multitude without the present help of God! and the hollow hearts of many are now revealled. God make us humble in his eyes, and then I fear not the furie of the adversaries, who, be ye assured, doe sore rage, so as yet their crueltie must neids crave vengeance from him whose members they persecute. Our dear brethren and sisters in Edinburgh and Lothian who lay nearest these bloode thirsty tyrants, are so troubled and vexed that it is a pity to remember their estate. Our God comfort them. We stand universally in great fear, and yet we hope deliverance. I wrote to you before to be suitor tosome faithfull, that they would move such as have abundance to consider our estate, and to make for us some provision of money to keep soldiers and our company together. And herein yet again I cannot cease to move you. I can not well write to any other, because the action may seem to appertaine to my own country onlie. But because I trust ye suspect me not of avarice, I am bold to say to you that if we perish in this our enterprise, the limits of London will be straiter than they are now within few years. Many things I have which I would have required for myself, namely Calvin on Isaiah, and his Institutions revised. But common troubles cause me to neglect all private business. If ye can find the means to send me the books before written, or any other that be new and profitable, I will provide that ye shall receive the prices upon your advertisement. My wife saluteth you. Salute all faithfull heartilie in my name, especiallie those of familiar acquaintance, of whom I crave pardon that I write not, being not so quiet as ye would wish. My onlie comfort is that our troubles shall pass sooner, peradventure, than our enemies look. Grace be with you. From St Andrews, in haste, the 18th November, 1559. Yours known,
John Knox.
Mr Gudeman is in the west country in Ayr, who willed me to salute you in his name as oft as I wrote you.
No IX. [Cald. I. 524.]
To the same. (See vol. i. [315].)
We shall meet when death shall not dissever.
Two letters I have received from you, dear sister, both almost at one time, the one is dated at London the 28th of November, the other of the same place the 2d of December. The letter of the last date I first read, which made mention of your trouble be reason of a suddan fire in a lodging near to you; that you had sought all means for our support, as well of those of high as of low degree; but that it was not needfull that any thing should be sent unto us, because it was supposed that the highest would support us; andlast, that ye had not received the answer of your doubts. In your other letters, after your most comfortable discourse of God’s providence for his people in their greatest necessitie, ye godlie and trulie conclude that neither could their unworthiness, neither yet their want of things judged necessarie for their preservation, stop his majestie’s mercie from them. Thereafter ye will me to avoid danger, and rather to fight by prayer in some place removed from danger than expose my self to the hazard of battell, and so ye conclude by praising God’s mercie as did Jeremy in his greatest anguish, &c.
What support should come to us be consent of counsell and authoritie I am uncertain. But suppose it shall be greater than yet is bruted, that ought not to stay the liberall hands of the godlie to support us privatelie. For the public support of an army shall not make such as now be superexpended able to serve without private support. I will make the matter more plain be one example. I know one man that since the 10th of May hath spent in this action thirteen thousand crowns of the summe [sonne], besydes his victuals and other fruits of the ground. His treasure being now consumed, he cannot, without support, susteane the number which before he brought to the field. If he and such others that are in lyke condition with him shall be absent, or yet if numbers shall decay, our enemies shall seem to prevail in the field, and therfor desired I some collection to be made, to the end that the present necessitie of some might have been relieved. If the matter pertained not to my native country, I would be more vehement in persuasion, but God shall support even how, when, and by whom it shall please his blessed majestie. Sorry I am that ye have not received my answer unto your doubts, not so much that I think that ye greatlie need them, as that I would not put you in suspicion that I contemned your requests. The rest of my wife hath been so unrestful since her arrival here, that scarcelie could she tell upon the morrow what she wrote at night. She cannot find my first extract. And therfor, if any scruple remaine in your conscience, put pen again to paper, and look for ane answer, as God shall give opportunitie. God make yourself participant of the same comfort which you wrote unto me: and in very deed, dear sister, I have no lessneed of comfort, notwithstanding that I am not altogether ignorant, than hath the bound man to be fed, albeit in store he hath great substance. I have read the cares and tentations of Moses, and sometymes I have supposed myself to be well practised in such dangerous battells. But, alace! I now perceive that all my practice before was but mere speculation, for one day of troubles since my last arrival in Scotland hath more pierced my heart than all the torments of the galleys did the space of 19 months. For that torment, for the most part, did touch the bodie, but this pierceth the soul and inward affections. Then was I assuredlie persuaded that I should not die untill I had preached Christ Jesus even where I now am, and yet having now my heart’s desyre, I am nothing satisfied, neither yet rejoice. My God remove my unthankfulness. From Sanct Andrews, the last of December 1559.