Alike a gamester and a wit,
At night he was seen with Crockford's crew,
At morn with learned dames would sit—
So past his time 'twixt black and blue.
Some wisht to make him an M. P.,
But, finding Wilks was also one, he
Swore, in a rage, "he'd be damned, if he
"Would ever sit in one house with Johnny."
At length as secrets travel fast,
And devils, whether he or she,
Are sure to be found out at last,
The affair got wind most rapidly.
The Press, the impartial Press, that snubs
Alike a fiend's or an angel's capers—
Miss Paton's soon as Beelzebub's,
Fired off a squib in the morning papers:
"We warn good men to keep aloof
"From a grim old Dandy seen about
"With a fire-proof wig and a cloven hoof
"Thro' a neat-cut Hoby smoking out."
Now,—the Devil being gentleman,
Who piques himself on well-bred dealings,—
You may guess, when o'er these lines he ran,
How much they hurt and shockt his feelings.
Away he posts to a Man of Law,
And 'twould make you laugh could you have seen 'em,
As paw shook hand, and hand shook paw,
And 'twas "hail, good fellow, well met," between 'em.
Straight an indictment was preferred—
And much the Devil enjoyed the jest,
When, asking about the Bench, he heard
That, of all the Judges, his own was Best.[1]
In vain Defendant proffered proof
That Plaintiff's self was the Father of Evil—
Brought Hoby forth to swear to the hoof
And Stultz to speak to the tail of the Devil.
The Jury (saints, all snug and rich,
And readers of virtuous Sunday papers)
Found for the Plaintiff—on hearing which
The Devil gave one of his loftiest capers.