It has bin an old saying, and a true, what is bred in the bone will not out of the flesh, nor the stepping into the pulpit that can make the person fitt for the imployment. The unfitnes of the person undertaking to be the Messenger Lewes the II. sent a Barber Embassador. has brought a blemish upon the message, as in the time of Lewes the Eleventh, King of France, who, (having advaunced his Barber to place of Honor, and graced him with eminent titles), made him so presumptuous to undertake an Embassage to treat with forraine princes of Civile affaires.
But what was the issue? Hee behaved himselfe so [{175}] unworthily, (yet as well as his breeding would give The Embassage despised. him leave,) that both the Messenger and the message were despised; and had not hee, (being discovered,) conveyed himselfe out of their territories, they had made him pay for his barbarous presumption.[544]
Socrates sayes, loquere ut te videam. If a man observe these people in the exercise of their gifts, hee may thereby discerne the tincture of their proper calling, the asses eares will peepe through the lyons hide. I am sorry they cannot discerne their owne infirmities. I will deale fairely with them, for I will draw their pictures cap a pe, that you may discerne them plainely from head to foote in their postures, that so much bewitch, (as I may speake with modesty,) these illiterate people to be so fantasticall, to take Ionas taske[545] upon them without sufficient warrant.
A Grocer.
One steps up like the Minister of Iustice with the ballance onely, not the sword for feare of affrighting his auditory. Hee poynts at a text, and handles it as evenly as hee can; and teaches the auditory, that the thing hee has to deliver must be well waied, for it is a very pretious thing, yes, much more pretious then gold or pearle: and hee will teach them the meanes how to way things of that excellent worth; that a man would suppose hee and his auditory were to part stakes by the scale; and the like distribution they have used about a bag pudding.
A Taylor.
Another, (of a more cutting disposition,) steps in his steed; and hee takes a text, which hee divides into many parts: (to speake truly) as many as hee list. The fag end of it hee pares away, as a superfluous remnant.
[{176}] Hee puts his auditory in comfort, that hee will make a garment for them, and teach them how they shall put it on; and incourages them to be in love with it, for it is of such a fashion as doth best become a Christian man. Hee will assuer them that it shall be armor of proffe against all assaults of Satan. This garment, (sayes hee,) is not composed as the garments made by a carnall man, that are sowed with a hot needle and a burning thread; but it is a garment that shall out last all the garments: and, if they will make use of it as hee shall direct them, they shall be able, (like saint George,) to terrifie the greate Dragon, error; and defend truth, which error with her wide chaps would devoure: whose mouth shall be filled with the shredds and parings, which hee continually gapes for under the cutting bourd.
A Tapster.