“The Prophet used to divide his time equally amongst his wives, and he would say, ‘O God, I divide impartially that which thou hast put in my power.’ ”
“Admonish your wives with kindness, because women were created from a crooked bone of the side; therefore, if you wish to straighten it, you will break it, and if you let it alone, it will always be crooked.”
“Not one of you must whip his wife like whipping a slave.”
“A Muslim must not hate his wife, for if he be displeased with one bad quality in her, then let him be pleased with another that is good.”
“A Muslim cannot obtain anything better than an amiable and beautiful wife, such a wife who, when ordered by her husband to do a thing, will obey, and if her husband looks at her will be happy; and if her husband swears by her, she will make him a swearer of truth; and if he be absent from her, she will honour him with her own person and property.”
It is related that on one occasion the Prophet said: “Beat not your wives.” Then ʿUmar came to the Prophet and said, “Our wives have got the upper hand of their husbands from hearing this.” Then the Prophet permitted beating of wives. Then an immense number of women collected round the Prophet’s family, and complained of their husbands beating them. And the Prophet said, “Verily a great number of women are assembled in my home complaining of their husbands, and those men who beat their wives do not behave well. He is not of my way who teaches a woman to go astray and who entices a slave from his master.”
The legal position of a wife under Sunnī, and, with some slight differences, under Shīʿah law also, may be generally stated as follows:—
Her consent to a marriage is necessary. She cannot legally object to be one of four wives. Nor can she object to an unlimited number of hand-maids. She is entitled to a marriage settlement or dower, which must be paid to her in case of divorce or separation. She may, however, remit either whole or part of the dower. She may refuse to join her husband until the dower is paid. She may be at any time, with or without cause, divorced by her husband. She may seek or claim divorce (k͟hulʿ) from her husband with her husband’s consent. She may be chastised by her husband. She cannot give evidence in a court of law against her husband. According to the Sunnīs, her evidence in favour of her husband is not admissible, but the Shīʿahs maintain the opposite view. Her husband can demand her seclusion from public. If she becomes a widow, she must observe ḥidād, or mourning, for the space of four months and ten days. In the event of her husband’s death, she is entitled to a portion of her husband’s estate, in addition to her claim of dower, the claim of dower taking precedence of all other claims on the estate.
There are special arrangements made by Muslim law for the partition of the husband’s time amongst his wives in case he may have two or more wives. For it is related that Muḥammad said, “The man who has two or more wives, and who, in partition of his time, inclines particularly to one of them, shall in the Day of Judgment incline to one side by being paralytic.” And ʿĀyishah relates that the Prophet said, “O God, I make an equal partition amongst my wives as to what is in my power; do not, therefore, bring me to account for that which is not in my power, namely, the affections.” It is therefore ruled that the wife of a prior marriage and of a recent one, are all alike in the matter of the partition of time spent with them. The husband can, however, arrange and determine the measure of the partition of his time as to whether it be one day or more at a time. But if a man marry two wives, the one a free woman and the other a bond-maid, he must divide his time into three portions, giving two portions to the free woman and one to the bond-maid. When the husband is on a journey, his wives can make no claim to accompany him on the journey, and it is entirely at his option to carry along with him whomsoever he pleases, but it is preferable for him to cast lots and take with him on the journey her upon whom the lot may happen to fall. The time of the journey is not to be counted against a husband, and he is therefore not obliged to make up for the partition lost within that time. It is also allowed by the law, of one wife to give up her right as regards partition of time to any other of her husband’s wives. But if a woman give up her right, she is not at liberty to resume it. (Durru ʾl-Muk͟htār, in loco.)
The position of a wife as regards the law of divorce, is treated under the article [DIVORCE].