Bertie. Police! Oh me weputation! Wheh’s me eye-glaws?
Dollie. (Waving hand toward door!) Now clear out, both of you, quick, or you’ll get the G. B.
Bertie. Dweadful. (To Blake.) Aw, you mad weckless fellah, waising this wow! We’ll be wuined. (Pulling Blake hastily out R., Birdie glaring at them. Dollie C., laughing.)
Dollie. Well, that’s too rich. (Birdie glares at her.)
Quick Curtain.
ACT III.
Scene: Club rooms as before. Time, next day after Act II.
Mary. (Discovered as curtain rises.) Alfaretta is very negligent of her work lately. There’s the flowers for the president put away in the corner instead of on the desk, as they should be. (Puts flowers on the desk.) The postman is late to-day. Poor fellow! I wonder if he is stuck in the tube again. I wouldn’t be shot through that tube for anything. Just think of being chucked into that pipe and fired a mile between breaths. The man always looks as if he were out of breath. They say all the carriers have to be hypnotized before they go into the tube. I think it’s cruel. (During this speech she is looking at old letters in boxes.) There are letters here for a member that’s been dead five years. Why didn’t that party give notice of her demise. (Noise outside, L.) There’s Mack bringing the ice. Dear fellow! My heart is all in a flutter. I’ll just wait to see if he comes in here to speak to me. I know he will. He’s blue all day if he doesn’t see me. Oh, if that terrible Birdie Robbins should discover us. I aint a bit afraid of the president. If she ever says boo, I’ll just ask her how the Hon. Brennan de Cork is. Oh, there he comes.
Enter Mack, L.